IncompletedSentences

Get things of my chest and Move on..

2009-06-18T17:00:00.000-07:00

Well, i had my first exam today!
it is great!
still and three more to write!
my week is booked!
which is great!
never had a day where I'm book constantly.

That's why i want to find a new group of friends.
I'm rumbling on about how i hate people, wait scratch that!
I"m rumbling on about How i Hate girls in my group!
I dislike girls whom are clingy!
I have a friend name Taylor.
yes, she is clingy! She needs people to be around her when she doing her work after school
but won't wait for people to finish their work, even after promising them she would.
and excuses she gives is, you leave so near!
Thanks.your such a great friend.
I would always help her in her tech work,
and when i ask her for help, the respond she gives is "I don't Know!"
it seems like she wants me too fail
so she can succeed.
hopefully, i can boost to her about getting a better mark than
she got!
You should wonder why your on my hated list of Friends lined up in front of Carrissa!

The next thing about Taylor is that,
she somehow would talk in her baby voices when talking to us.
I don't why, maybe she trying to act cute.
but i don't see cute at all!
Her hair is flat as hell.
and i didn't want to offend her, and i put it in a nice way that i wanted to do her hair
but she didn't get that, she looks really bad.
Her hair is never pretty!even when she says it is!

I would laugh at people sometimes,
but not take it to heart! and i would laugh along with people
if they make fun of me. But she gets all pissy and starts threatening me.
even though, she not saying it for real. I don't like it at all!
I mean where is your sense of humor, just laugh along!
I can go on about how i hate all of them!
actually i will!

Harindar is always getting mood swings.
It is like she has permanent Period!
i hate it when she gets her mood swings she gets annoying!
She hates how Charissa dresses.
Thinks you have to dress a certain way to fit in!
I know she does, but hey that's why your like everybody else.
Other than your skin color.

Charissa is this new girl from Alberta whom thinks she all that!
When in reality, she is not.
She boost to be really smart.
When i ask her to help me with math questions
her answer was "I dont Know".
She rolls her eyes at me when i tell her i need to go in for math help!
She is even getting an 86 in Careers.
Calming to not care about that class.
Complains about not given enough work,
but when given alot, she didn't even hand them in on time!
Her dressing is like :OMG!!
It is unqiue ya, but like sometimes she goes over!
I even get embarrass standing next to her
and I'm not even dressed in what she is wearing!
That's how bad it is!

Overall, i can say this much!
I wish you guys would get over yourself.
Not think it is always about you!

I also dislike when people say their really lazy
or make up excuses, though, i do it sometimes to people i dont like!
but, i never say i'm lazy when a friend needs me.
So quit whining and grow up!
Cause, in the real world, there is no whining!

That's why sometimes i really am happy,
i have my asian crowd.
Cause the Canadians crowd, really need to open their eyes
and look at the world.

That's why i want to find a new group of friends.
Overall, I'm alright with them some days but some days
ARGH!!!
I feel better now, that i got that out!

I love you, my best Friend

2009-05-30T19:00:00.000-07:00

So, i just found out that Poppy died on Friday..

So this post is For her..

Because she passed away, made me regret so many things
I didn't even get to say goodbye..
and now, all i want to do is fly back
and bury her myself..

I wish i was given more time spend with her.
If i were back in singapore
i would have known that she was sick
because she is family and you know
when family is sick..

I should have known that something was going to happen
because i had bad luck all of today..
But i guess that puppy is going to be in a better place now

You were there for me and i will miss you!
Though, i didn;t say goodbye..
I really hope you know i love you alot!
Though, i really wish you waited 3 more weeks
till i got home.:(

R.I.P Puppy girl, 29 May 09.

Disaster strucks but no brightside

2009-05-15T18:15:00.000-07:00

Have you had so much homework that you didnt know where to start?
Well, i have.
This weekend is going to be long!yes!
but it comes with a price!
Firstly
-Math homework, test on wed
-Math assignment due on Thur
-History visual presentation
-history test friday
-Careers who am i poster
-history presentation

All due next week..
and the best part of all, i have track on thursday!!
and what am i going to do?

im so hungry and frustrated!
i looked like a nerd carrying my books.

Over with the depressing part..
and on to the good news!
There is a guy that i have a major crush on!
only thing, he is my friend's brother
and teacher son!

great right?
But he has the greatest eyes..
and cool smile!
We have had a 0.05 sec moment
well, i think that,i don't know about him!

He is so nice, that yesterday,
he accepted to say happy birthday to a girl.
even without asking for anything!
and usually guys would say
"if i did that, what would you do for me?"
i was upset, because i was sitting next to the girl who asked him
I didn't even want to know who has a crush on him!
if only that girl didnt sat beside me!

I'm going to miss him so much over the summer!
:(
I have even said a word to him before!
Though we cheer for each other during races..
i know i do, don't know about him
BUT!
There is one thing i know for sure, he knows my name!!:):):):)

HOME!

2009-05-04T18:22:00.000-07:00

GUESS WHAT DARLINGS!!

IM HOME IN 50 DAYS!!!

I had the weirdest dream last night..
i dreamt i was back in Singapore..
and i didn't even make it out the airport!
and i woke up!

Don't you hate it, when you dream of something
and you get to the most exciting part..
and suddenly you just wake up..
your mum or your dad!

always happens to me,
and that only comes one in a life time!
Someone should invent this dictator thing
which shows that we are dreaming about something good
and shouldn't be woken up!

Well, im pretty happy with myself today because
i manage to do 3200m out of the 4400m!
my times were pretty good too..
i did 450 for the first 1000m
and 530 for the second 1000m

and 149 for 400m and better and worst
for the last two!!
coolness righto!

Theories of the day

2009-04-27T19:00:00.000-07:00

MY HUNDRED POST!!
DOESN'T EVEN SEEM LIKE IT!

I'm really so bored
to bored to even blog.

I can blog of two cute guys though!
And Misha's soon to be boyfriend

I would Post their pictures
but then i would sound like a creep
and a dude i want to hook misha up

He is American, and too hot to be a nice dude!
if he is hot and is nice, he must be gay!

what do you think of that theory?

So i had three boys living with me, for 3 weeks..
too bad it was my cousins!
i would scream, if 3 hotties lived with me, but that won't be reality!

Drove me Nuts..
ihate people who don't finish their food,
i always think of the poor people who live in AISA and Africa..
My cousins wasted so much food!

Another thing that pissed me off, is that playhouse disney..
hate watching that channel..
Had to watch it, since i was force too.
I was watching it, and thinking how dumb it is!
and then i thought to myself.

They teach kids to avoid strangers, to count..
But, why in the world won't they teach kids
that they have to finish their food!

Cause my four year old cousin asked me
"why do i always have to finish my dinner"
because he wanted oreos..!
WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?

Who would ask that?
Why in the world would you ask that?

Don't you know, that you have too!
there is no reason!
IT IS like asking why do i have to eat..!?

People here, aren't as smart as they look!
the worst people you get people are the ones who love to act like blondes!

Really when you have the answer in front of you..
why would you ask the question again..
like really?
is it that funny to be stupid!?

Lastly, the greatest theory given to me:
"Don't let anyone put you down on the things you want to do or not the greatest,
as long as you got heart in doing it, your the best"

well gotta do math homework!

I <3 Jenna Jameson

2009-04-04T23:35:00.000-07:00

Creepy to be hearting Jenna Jameson..
you will see why.
IM NO LES,FYI
Who is this Jenna Jameson, im talking about.
The Guys would be "i know her."
The Girls must be scratching their head, thinking wtf is this Jenna girl..

HERE SHE IS

Now

Then

I think she looks really pretty Now,

then she look then.

So, what makes her famous and why only guys would know her.
It is because she the world FAMOUS PORNSTAR!
Why am i blogging about her.
Well, you have to be Patience.

Just, to let you know, i wasn't watching PORN!
I SWEAR!!

So, this is how i found out about her.
I was watching Simple Life, and she was in it.
My Brother was like that Jenna Jameson
and I'm ask him who is that?

Though, it did RING a bell, because i saw her on some reality show
in which she starred in it.

cause she looked so different
And I was thinking to myself omg, she looks so pretty now!
and my brother was said, you know she no longer a porn star

I was thinking why isn't she a pornstar
but i just left it there.

I was searching for the Fred videos one day,
and Tyra Banks with him appeared..
At the sides showed others and
this one of Sasha Grey was in it.

This girl is NUTS!
She like 18 and SHE THINK BEING A PORNSTAR IS GREAT!.
Go watch it!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BxUq_zzvAaA

Anyway, there was a link of Jenna Jameson,
25 Reasons why no one should be a pornstar.

When i read it, i was like so shocked!

This two hot-shot are like the most arrogant guys ever
we have MR Wesley Snipes who asked her " Do you like it up the ass"!
and Bruce Willis who makes-out with her for 30seconds straight and walks off.

I was so shocked when i goggled them and found it was them!
But Ms Jameson, had her pride, she totally ditched them!
Good For her!

The other thing is that they aren't given any respect
in that industry, the guys don't respect you, neither does the other people.
Even if,your FAMOUS and won so many award, for best porn!

The girls are really bitchy to each other, but like house bunny, and
Lohan House they seems LIKE FRIENDS! but i forgot IT's TV!!

The sad thing about how girls go into the Porn industry,
is when something cruel happens to them during their childhood
and this is what happened to Jenna Jameson.

But, she quit the Industry, and The best part is she said"I would never want my daughter to follow in my footsteps"!and now, she has to twin boys!

She wrote a book about the life of a pornstar. How to make love like a pornstar: A Cautionary Tale.And of course, i want to buy it.

AND NO, it doesnt teach you how to make love, it is a FREAKING AUTOBIORGAPHY!
as, the title may mislead you..

And Guess what Singapore has banned the book!No suprise there, i guess, i just have to look for it here!

Inside scoop on her book.READ IT,DONT READ IT
http://antipornographyactivist.blogspot.com/2007/07/jenna-jamesons-twenty-five-good-reasons.html

Just to let the dudes know, that, it may look like the couples are very passionate in the porn videos, but they actually aren`t that passionate.Imagine yourself having sex with an ugly girl with all your friends watching!?

AHUH, That's what i thought!

Rin On The RoX and Fred!

2009-03-30T15:30:00.000-07:00

Rin On The RoX, dont you think it is such a cool band name
well, it is baiscally form
by two girls
name ERIN and Roxanne.
wow-la it gives you Rin on the Rox.

I have a feeling that they will become famous soon!
Their pipes (Voice) are sweet! and they were on Ellen Degeneres

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eR0-c4VrM9U

They are always singing in the bathroom!
what a place to be singing eh?
but hey!
We all do it!

Next, we have FRED aka Lucas
Fred is a 6year old kid
Lucas is the actor and so very hot!

I was over at friends the first time i saw him
and didn't think much about him.
He appeared as a guest star on Icarly, (dont ask)
and then i remember about him.

He is hilarious! i have one of his videos..
it is just as funny as Charlie bit my Finger..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nEqwKNNQBwc

Sun And Moon= Eclipse

2009-03-25T16:46:00.000-07:00

*Spoiler Alert!If you haven't read Eclipse, this would ruin the whole book!

The twilight series is the awesome-ness eve, so im on the third book as you can see.!
I was told that the book gets worst as by the series!
but for me, it was the total opposite, i'm laughing at the stupid things Edward and Jacob does!
My grandma even thought i was talking to a friend!
Breaking Dawn is next and it has 700 pages, which i think i would be done by the end of April!

I dont know if you can see it.

If you can't see it..
It says: Will you kiss me,Jacob?
Bella:"Kiss me,Jacob,Kiss me and then come back"

There is another kissing Scene before this one.Where Jacob forces a kiss on Bella!
I was so pissed to find out that he kissed her, cause i ask my friends.
They all told me that they won't.
You can't imagine how upset i was, when they told me no!

Then, to find out that they had a kissing scene, NOT ONE
But TWO! is OMG!I can't even explain the feeling.
I can't wait till Eclipse comes out!Just skip new moon and
film Eclipse!

Memories from way back!

2009-03-19T21:46:00.000-07:00

SCENE 1

I was talking to Misha on Msn the other day..
And she told me about how different hidayah is from her little group!
which lead to other memories!

I remember Sec 2, Hidayah and I were like walking home buddies!
Yea, she is totally different from when she is with those 3 girls
I remember one time, i almost got hit by a car, because i was to lazy to wait for
the green man.

So, there was a car coming and you know how impatience Singapore drivers are
when your a slow walker and like the red man has come on
and your still not across the street?
Well, the little fucker honked at me
because he was in a hurry to turn and i was blocking him!

Anyway, She and i laughed it off..though i was still in embarrassment!

SCENE 2

The other thing i remember is Fahmy was my biggest enemy!
I haven't had any fights with guys since sec 2!

I remember he anti me and i anti him..
Now, we are like friends,
and when we talk,
we talk normally and
not every words is criticizing one another!

SCENE 3

The last thing i remember is!
Misha big secret!totally kidding!
The five of us, Shikin,Misha, ME, Song Chen and Eng Hock!
it was fun, i dont how we ended up joining table but i knew,
i was a very unlucky person that year!
I always sat beside Kaylyn!

Misha and Shikin were the only ones that i could talk too.
And Ms Loong was a meanie!She won't let us switch places
though, everyone did!
Song chen was upset too, cause Eng Hock was like his PIC!
and he sat all the way in front..

We would always be asked by our teachers why is there a row
at the back, and you could see that i was culprit! since i sat in the middle of the five!

Ms Wang would always turn off the fan and lights
and people would go turn it on!haha, and i would
tell her i was sweating like a PIG, though
i don't think PIG sweat at all!

SCENE 4

THE ONE THING,EVERYONE HAS TO REMEMBER was the chair prank!
Song chen and friends decided to test it on me first!
it didnt even look like it was broken, till you sat down!
and omg, i was so embarassed but all i could do was laugh it off..
The other people who were pranked were, Katlyn,BK and Amirah
i dont know if there was anymore..

But,Amirah didnt take it in well and thus that chair was broken into
two.So, it won't bring anymore tears!
Stupid Song Chen with the stupid Idea..

But it were all great memories!

The Twilight Hottie

2009-03-11T17:19:00.000-07:00

I'm on the third twilight book!
"Eclipse"
New moon was awesome!
Fell in love with Jacob..
So, i wished that Bella would love Jacob then Edward!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dmUHhxL0dm0-->Watch this tyra show..
It is so freaking hilarious!

So, THIS IS TAYLOR LAUTNER!
EVERYONE SCREAM!!!!

Taylor Lautner has a killer smile that makes my heart meltz!!
and along with that killer smile, is his freakishly hot body!

He is way way hotter than Misha's ZAC EFRON!!
But he has one thing in common with zac efron!
he got a girlfriend!Name : Sara Hicks!
or maybe they broke up..

There is a link below!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nlqXJihbULE

I so wish to like talk to him, and ask him what he likes and everything,
just have a day to spend with him!
he is so much hotter than the Jo Bros
The Jonas Brothers are outdated!
That just my opinion!

If, i could meet/date Taylor Lautner for a day!
I would take him on a stroll down by the beach..
Romantic what!
Workout together, ask him to show off his karate moves!*Aww, Faint*
Then,beat him at guitar hero..haha!
Lastly, Go swimming!
What a joy it would really be..
But only a dream!

A girl can dream, ok!
But, where is my Prince charming!
When New Moon airs, he would show-up!Fosure!:)

Ps:Misha, zac efron is a fake.He is a clone of Chace Crawford!

I can't wait for the New Moon Movie to come out!

Winter is Endiing!

2009-03-10T21:28:00.000-07:00

I got to make this a quicky because i have to study for a history test
i have on thursday on freaking WAR WORLD 1..

My marks are like so awesome, not to brag or anything
-have a freaking 90 in tech
-have a 74 in stupid civis
-79 in history which is really bad
-and 88 in math, i could have gotten a 95 for it though!
aiya!!!

Winter is ending, thank the lord..
means that i can wear shorts!

Going to Toronto for the March Break!

Today, Watched the guys try-out for basketball..
They were so awesome!
My running teacher thought maybe i was watching it because of the guys!
But, i was watching it because of my friend's bf..
and because i love basketball too!!

A NEW SKIN!

2009-02-25T17:34:00.000-08:00

Omg, i took an hour and a half to do this blog skin..
I got tired of looking at blog skins that people made..
thought i tired my own..
It was easier than i thought, because i actually did try to make my own.
But, fail countless time..
Finally i manage to get it!
Phew!

So, tomorrow, we have WEST FEST!
Which means i'm off to Ottawa!..(:
Excited! Winter is almost over, and dad is coming home soon..
Means food from Singapore..

I have 3 MORE MONTHS LEFT Till i get on that plane!

Then, it is time to PARTY!

I Want to watch Slumdog Millionaire..They won 8 grammys i think!so must be a great movie..

Yesterday, we had a buy-out, and i got to watch my very first hockey game "LIVE".
Teachers vs Graduating Students..
Students won. I left before the game end..And it was 13-5..

LASTLY, Eminem Is back, love his new song "crack a bottle".

OUTDOOR SKATING!

MOST RANDOMIEST POST!

2009-02-19T20:59:00.000-08:00

Valentine's day was an ok day!
spent my weekend at Harindar's, would have like to be in Singapore,
get REALLY HIGH!

I have to wear glasses..
and i don't really know what to pick!
i think i have decided on a yellow/brown, i look dumb in glasses!..argh!

Have been watching Passchendaele and Pearl Harbor!
They are so sad, well, it is basically about war,
so obviously it is sad.

But, like the guy in Pearl Harbor is a hottie!

Anyway, It was PINK DAY today!
so everyone had to wear pink..
it is like racial harmony day!

We had to dress in pink because, some kid got beat up for being himself!
like what the crap!
I miss wearing uniforms!
I miss my friends

I have to make a karaoke lyrics for technology and im doing Africa, Stuck and Summertime!

I hope i got the volunteer at the hospital!

I wish summer came quicker, but went by slowly!

My mum's a bitch

You, the annoying person

2009-02-11T18:17:00.000-08:00

Anyway, there is something that is annoying me,someone who claims..
that everyone is in love with her!
Like seriously, get over yourself..nobody likes you..

and please stop harassing my friends, i know, they are way smarter than you,
like your smart too, but it is your fault that you didn't get in!
stop dissing them, and go work hard!you can only blame yourself for your wrong doing..
Being jealous wont lead you anywhere..

Please stop the self-pity!nobody wants to listen to them.GOD! go tell it to someone who cares.
well, actually,nobody cares..and your right nobody can understand how you feel, nobody wants too!AND!you smell of weed and alcohol..I can smell it from far away.Being drunk and high won't even get you anywhere..

Stop using people,by telling them you got no money, when you can buy your weed and alcohol, and telling them you would pay them back!including me!im not your resource centre.Im your friend, not your mother or your sister.

Soon, im not gonna talk to you, and neither are my friends..so you better change your attitude, cause when i do get mad, OHHH, girl, your in for it!

Lastly,Your pictures on facebook are fugly,nobody wants to see your fats, you should take them down,before someone reports you of showing to much skin!haha..

Fabuloous Feb.NOT!

2009-02-11T18:09:00.000-08:00

THIS IS WHAT I HAVE BEEN DOING DAILY!

my castle is crap..really crappy..
doesnt even look like a castle..it totally reminds me of rolie poli olie..

the cupboard is suppose to be an antique Chinese cupboard,
but the length of it, it is just to wide, to be a cupboard..
so im going to say it is a bed..
im sure a bed is a furniture.

next i have to make is a record player..and olden day record player..spend one hour to find the details to it!It is so tough to make..i dont know if i will be able to make it..
i hope i can design it..

A new semester

2009-02-03T21:41:00.000-08:00

I suppose to be doing my history homework
but i'm have no mood after crying for like 15minutes on and off..
I was busy watching Bull Fighting and I'm at the part where Mike He breaks off with Hebe Tian because he wants to help his father's company.

Even though, he loves Hebe, he still agree to marry some other girl!OMG, and the way he like tells her he doesn't love her, is so heart-breaking and cruel..I think i cried even more than she did!
I can't believe she didn't chase after him when he stopped hugging her..I wanted to scream at her..ARGH!

Anyway, Semester 2 is like one of the worst semesters i ever had!Why?
First period, my class is on 3rd, when im sleepy i dont feel like climbing up the stairs and nicely to have math earlier in the morning.NOT MY CUP OF TEA!The most sad thing is i sit right in front of the teacher and i dont have any friend in that class.:(

Period 2, worst worst most hated class..I have a crazy teacher and that not the worst part, this is..I sitted next to the door by myself, if you weren't in that class, you would have thought, i was a talkative girl who couldn't sit beside anyone.Like seriously,right and left and front no one..
only behind..sad right!I'm the only one!The class is full of snotty people, and i dont even know what is going on in that class.

Period 3, i walk in and the teacher is like are you suppose to be in this class and im like yes.Then i notice my crush is in the same class with me..WOOOT!
Things i notice about him
-He likes hockey
-somewhat talkative
-Bites his nail..
-bites on his pen
-CUTE!
i know, my chance is here, lucky me,NOT!..i don't know, i kind of like that class, because my so-called friends are in that class..

Period 4, this Jake guy who added me on facebook sits next to me!We still haven't talked, i dont think he has a crush on me since he got a girlfriend, i guess it is a concidence.I got really frusated with the Sketchup software,we have to create a castle..A CASTLE I TELL YOU!..I sighed alot i think he got irrarated!I spent 75mins just creating my pond with a bridge.

I might want to create a scary castle on the outside and like a heaven on the inside!It might take a long time, but it is worth it, im guessing!
Got homework on the first day and i haven't not got any..ARGH!annoying..

You say your a demon and an angel

2009-02-01T00:27:00.000-08:00

So, i got a text from sista dear..
and i heard my motha(should i even call her that) is kicking my sista, out of the house because vanz doesn't want to listen to her.

“Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.”

-this is a great quote to prove this situation.She never listens but she wants people to listen to her, wait, no,she force people to listen to her.
There was a quote i heard about taming a lion that somehow relates to this..
or a donkey..

I wish i was with my nessa.. not even a month there, and she is being kicked out again!
oh, my nessa, you are a strong girl.I'm glad i have a sister like ya.

Anyway, i feel that most of my entries are like really emotional.
The world is such a sad place to live, but we gotta to see the bright side of things.
Reading to kill a mocking bird made me see the other side of things.
You gotta to read the book to understand what i mean.

Anyway, to kill my sadness, i been watching Bull fighting, omg, it is interesting.. i didn't think it would be because the guy who acts in why why love, i thought it was boring, so i thought this drama was going to be boring..but i decided to give it a try since Hebe Tian is in it.

well, im going to do some matras and then continue my 3rd episode of Bull fighting.!CYA..
School starts in 30 hours..):

More Time, Means More Me Time

2009-01-27T14:51:00.000-08:00

SO, finally examz are over..woot, woot!
but im like so bored right now!
doing nothing but, be emo.
if i were in singapore,
i would be hanging out with nessa
ordering mac, and watching a scary movie.
or hanging out with RYAN,BOB, ZAK?

SO Boys over Flower KOREA!
The first thought about this movie
was UGLY DUDES
but, then i watched the movie.
since im a big fan of Meteor garden.
The only dudes i find attractive is
the two non-main actors.
Xi-men and Mei Zou.
The girl is cute though,
but after watching it, I'm not at episode 4
i find it hilarious but there are some embarrassing
moments which i don't dare to watch,
because it is just to embarrassing!

I wanna see this movie,
i saw the first two ones, and loved it!
i thought it was boring but it
is like twilight.
I watched this first that's how i ended up
liking twilight too!

MSN with Nabilah!

Heidi^dididididi:P says: I'm Superman."
(X)Fedoura says: huh?
Heidi^dididididi:P says: I lost my eye ball though
(X)Fedoura says: huh?
Heidi^dididididi:P says: OH my god i heard about your dog
(X)Fedoura says: i dont have any dog
Heidi^dididididi:P says: pickle
(X)Fedoura says: hm
Heidi^dididididi:P says: My goldfish just died
(X)Fedoura says: aaww so sad
Heidi^dididididi:P says: Did you just lie to me!?
(X)Fedoura says: no i didnt
Heidi^dididididi:P says: How could you?
(X)Fedoura says: yeah right
Heidi^dididididi:P says: I hate you
(X)Fedoura says: okay
Heidi^dididididi:P says: I cannot believe this.
(X)Fedoura says: i cant believe this either
Heidi^dididididi:P says: He said what
(X)Fedoura says: what
Heidi^dididididi:P says: Do you like baby meat?
(X)Fedoura says: no
Heidi^dididididi:P says: Woah, did you just hear that thunder?
(X)Fedoura says: there's no thunder
Heidi^dididididi:P says: Do you like ponies?
(X)Fedoura says: yes
Heidi^dididididi:P says: Remember last night when we did that !
(X)Fedoura says: did what?
Heidi^dididididi:P says: hahah!
Heidi^dididididi:P says: this was funny

so as, you can see i played a trick on nabilah
she thought it was DARCY!
it was funny, at first i thought she wouldn't reply after
the second message but she did!

next person targeted is Misha!
and some other people!
Well, i'm going to watch some show and be BORED!
do some laundry or clean the Kitchen!

Errors,mistakes and lies

2009-01-26T21:22:00.000-08:00

I was reading my old posts!
i don't have much, but i like reading them because
they remind me of how childish i was, i still am.

Anyways, I was reading a post about a crush i had at
my work place, and god that was a huge disaster!
I realize I'm really bad at lying, have been for the longest
time.No wonder that Jun Long doesn't believe a word i say.

My posts also had loads of typos and missing words.
Embarrassing man!
i did some correction on them,
so that i would understand myself
in the future.

So, as i was saying, i'm really bad
at keeping my secrets
and the people at my work places
whom i thought were trustworthy
turn out to be frauds!

All back stabbed me,
well, i learn my lesson and that
i can't trust people who gossip.but, i trust
like people i have been with a long time.

The back stabbing still went on,
even when i left, that is how bad the gossip is.
Like, the only person i could trust in the end,
was my ex-crush and Marco.

The ending to the crush story, the future us,
he and i have turn into good friends
still really mischievous towards each other.
We still fight like siblings.
We comfort each other in situation
and I miss bullying him!

Marco on the hand,
i don't know where he is.
Another cool friend,
whom i treasure, but
i think he and i would lost contact.

I think i learnt my lesson,
hopefully, i won't make that mistake again.
but there is a dude in school whom i like,
and i told Harindar only.
Now, like 8 girls know.

Morgan was going to tell him,
but i told no, she might say something
that i might not ever want to say hi to him.
YES, i haven't talked to this guy before.

But, he is really cute, and seem really nice.
But, i want to try and talk to him soon.
Hopefully, he is not done with whatever
he is doing at the Legion,
give me a chance to say something to him!

I made end up wasting the chance.
But, at least, let me admire from far!
that would be good.

Everyone fears it! Dreadful Examz

2009-01-25T12:48:00.000-08:00

So, i have a science exam this Monday. Freaking out, because, i haven't really studied for it. The weather part is just plain dumb, because i dont think it helps me in life. I wish he didn't add that to the exam and just made us do a whole project on it.

So i have
-Bio
-Chem
-Physic
-Weather

And guess what i only start reviewing bio.
physic is dumb, never taking that ever ever again! and chem is ok..but weather, i see no point in it!

MONDAY
I'm back from my science.. the paper was easy..but, like since i decided that i wasn't going to study i did really badly! There were questions that i thought weren't going to come out but they did! Idiot!
But, the great part is done with physic forever, i think.PHEW!

Tomorrow,is english! and semester 2 starts in a week! HAPPY MAN!

MY very messy room!
due to studying..

LASTLY HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR 2 ALL MY CHINESE PALS!

The one and only Vanz!AKA NESSA POO

2009-01-22T19:59:00.000-08:00

THE FATTY!

I was trying to look for
a really funny picture of you.
This is the only one i thought was funny..

The picture i was trying to take

while we were walking to
the spaghetti factory!
EPIC FAILURE

OH NESSA POO!
I'm trying to study for stupid Family Studies!
but all i can think about is your not coming back..
Your not going to come back tonight, nor tomorrow, or next week
I've already done all the laundry to keep my mind busy..
but, it was done within 5minutes..
I MISS YOU DEARLY!

I know i didn't cry at the airport!
i dont know why..
i had a long chat with IAN!
but then when it was time for bed!
I cried my eyes out!
I even took your pillow for comfort!

You know how smelly you are!
but the pillow didn't even smell of anything!
There is my tears left on it!

You know what darcy said..
he wanted to put a funny picture on your pillow
but we couldn't find your PROM Picture!
You know, if people mention about you..
I feel sad, and then i get teary!
it feels like im not going seee you again..
but it is only 5months till we meet!
it feels like you passed away..HAHA!

NESSA, what am i going to do without you!
the house is so peaceful without you..
there is no bullying of you..
who am i going tell my stories and gossip to
if you are not here!?

remember to come pick me up at the airport
when i come back from Canada..
Bring all your friends too if you want!
I hope you have fun in Singapore
and dont forget I love you SO very much!

Remember to find clubs to take me too!
Remember to look after my dogs!

Have a great 19th birthday in june..!
*Tears*
The house feels empty without you!

what a day!

2009-01-08T14:05:00.000-08:00

Exams are coming in less than 2 weeks..
which means new courses next semester
and new people!

I can't wait, for exams to be over!
I hope i passed with an 80+ average
I'm assuming I'm doing so well,
in all my courses.

There is a new dude that i like now..
He is awesomely cute!
He works near my place.
I'm so tempted to go up and say hi.
I got so many people opinion
on how i should start.

They all good but i don't have the courage
can you believe the talkative Heidi is afraid!?
Morgan, said she will go with me and talk with him.!
She told me to go up and just say hi.
But, i feel like i'm going to end up looking like a fool!

That's why i pray that i will have him in my class
next semester!He is in tech but i have it next semester.
How unlucky I'm!
i feel i'm getting more unluckier each year!
No one wants to hire me..
I don't why?

I hope i really get the tuition Job
and the babysitting Job..
Please,Please!
I want to make more friends
and get out of the house!
PLEASE MAKE THIS WISH COME TRUE!!!

PIPER!

Another thing is that i walked this really awesome
dog named Piper.
He is hyper and just like my dear Taffy!
He loves the snow,i took him for a walk
but instead we just played in the snow.

He would put his face into the snow and then
i would disturb him and he attack me..
At one point, he took my mitts and
won't give it back!
So, when we got back to the Kennel,
He dropped it..
hahah, what i cool Dog,
i want to adopt it,but i'm not allowed

Im off to beddy..
Nitex
and it is -21 last night!!

Regrets of the past,but life goes on.

2009-01-04T02:09:00.000-08:00

First post of the New year!

School starts in less than a day and how i dread it.
To see the couples kissing,to see happy friends hugging each other and welcoming the new year.
Then, you have me, rushing in to get to first period, with my new hair, wet/dry( i haven't decided yet).

Trying to open my locker, and Harindar comes out smiling at me, and saying Happy New Year.
I think of all my friends back in Singapore, having a great time at school, either making new friends or laughing about what is gonna happen in the future.

The regrets i have, is that,I'm gonna miss Canberra's Sports and Art Fest.Never will ever get to attend it again.The year i would have got to go, my mother made me stay and help her.I should have defy her, and go to it.

Another thing, i would regret is moving to Canada andd having to miss the growing years of friends in Singapore.The Laughter, the break-ups, the excitement,the Sadness and lastly the gossip.

But, the biggest regret is not being able to walk home and go to school with Vanessa.I remember being in primary 1, she wasn't really around, though, we were in the same school.Then she moved to Sembawang Primary , and then i moved to Sembawang Primary when i was in Primary 4.One year, to go home with her.

Then she graduated and went to Yishuntown.When, i graduated from Sembawang Primary she went to CIS, and so i decided Canberra Sec, if not Yishuntown would have been the choice.I moved to CIS, two years later, i thought, maybe i would be in the same school with her.How I was wrong, then i went to high school, a year later, but, never got to go to school with her since she had Co-op.She left for Canada later that year, leaving me in the school for 3months.We got to go to school together in Canada.I only realized how much i needed her, and how she was my best friend.That 6 months, we were tight, i would never forget it, and it would be the last time, i would ever get to walk with her to school.

She has graduated and is moving back to Singapore, for a year.Leaving me in the pot-head country.Which i absolutely despise, deep down in my heart.No one can ever know how i feel till they actually, live the way i did.

How the world can be very unfair.But, everything is just unfair.I was at volunteer and the dogs there were crying, like i was so upset, i wanted to cry, having no love, and being tortured.I would like to love them all and take them home with me but i can't.

I go to the humane society to volunteer.They should have one in Singapore. This means that that they don't put the dogs to sleep even though, there is no space.

Mary,
she is such a cutie,really hyper.
she so strong, that i need to hands and
body weight to stop her from running away.

I dont know these puppies really well.
but, they look cute to me
but, i can't walk them.

These puppies were actually 9.
But, after new years when i went back,
they was only 4 left.
i bet, they would be gone, when i go back
next week.
They are really cute.

Masset, She really hyper, haven't got a chance
to walk her, cause i'm afraid of her.
She is really intimidating and
so i don't know whether, she is just like that or
puts on a show of being fierce.

I realized that, the world should stop letting pet-animals breed,because there are so many out there who wants our love and need us.I haven't been back to the Humane Society for 2 weeks and when i was back there, there were like maybe 9 new dogs there.So many animals, but there are more humans, so why don't consider adopting one.All dogs are cute no matter how old they are.:)

My resolutions for 2009

2008-12-31T15:03:00.000-08:00

I have a whole list of Resolutions for 2009!

I'm gonna miss 2008.
The year when i turn 16,
i want to stay 16 forever.
What a perfect age.

But life goes on.

So,
-Firstly, to get an honor roll
-Get a Job
-Find Prince Charming..(HAHa)
-Have the best summer
-Keep my clean record among friends
-Remember to not gossip about people to any friends(Canada)
-Get out of the shy-zone
-Get abs!
-Figure out what i want to do in College
-Make Emma Shut her mouth
-Make this year go slower..(HAHA)
-Get along with people no matter how weird and mean they are

I think that is about it

Tonight, i m gonna go to a party!
and i hope it would be a great one..

Welcoming the New Year

2008-12-30T22:00:00.000-08:00

2009 is gonna be here in 30 hours time..
i'm not even ready for 2009..
what am i going to expect in 2009?

Every year, i hope for a better year.
but, each year it doesn't!
Last year, i hoped for a better year,
and it didn't!

2006-i wished for a better year, but, my two beloved
friends passed away..

2007-i wished for a better year, instead,
my parents fought and didn't have Christmas with dad and Nessa

2008-i wished for a better year, but,
i missed out on the break-up, Chalet,the collecting of results.Had to move to Canada, and jobless for a year!

2009-I really really hope this would be the year, i would just want to stay in..
just like the year of 2005 and half of 2006!

Just to let everyone know,
i got a hair cut!
im not very fond of this hairstyle!
because,i look older..
and i took like an hour to straighten/comb/mess my hair
today
because we were gonna go see Aunt Jane.
The fridge is the killer.The lady didn't even cut it properly.
it looked ridiculous and so Vanessa helped me to recut it!

Since it is New years In Singapore in less than 2 hours!
i wanna wish a very special friend MISHA, HAPPY 16 BIRTHDAY!
and Everyone Happy New YEAR!
Too bad I'm not gonna be your very exciting, awesomeness, stripping and drinking birthday!
haha..

Yoou Asshole!

2008-12-27T17:15:00.000-08:00

This situation happened 2 weeks back!
Emma, Taylor and I were having lunch together.
That week, we had an important science test.
So, we decided to go to the science room to get
extra help from Mr Lenters

But, he wasn't doing his job in helping us.
so, we were just standing around talking..
Emma asked me to write her name in Mandarin
which Obversely i don't know how to write it.
Since, my mandarin is not that awesome!

So, i told her, that i couldn't write it..
and she like how can you not know
how to write your friends name..

i was trying to explain it to her,
that we weren't taught to write friend's name
and were taught other things

Luckily, my other friend was understanding.
She tried to help em explain it to her.
but, the bitch still didn't get it..
Like omg, SHUT UP..

I was so offended already,
i was so pissed off,
Emma looked at my friend and
was like "how can you not know how to write your friends name"
if she hasnt realised it im not that smart in mandarin,
and she should have know that she is not that smart herself..BITCH!

So, I'm really pissed off with her,
I'm in science with her,
and she thinks she really cool.
She keep on arguing with the teacher when
he was explaining stuff to us.

She thinks she is right,
and even tries to correct him,
i was in the mood
TO TAKE MY PENCIL OR KNIFE
(if i could find one)
and stab her!

She such an idiot,
but then i couldn't do it,
because i would be sent to jail.

The other thing i wanted to tell her was,
if you think your so smart, then why don't you go up there and teach us.
but, i'm coward and so i couldn't do it!

I told myself, the year i'm graduation for CDCI WEST.
Is the day,all this bitches get a piece of HEIDI MCDOWELL
They better stop being assholes!

The Party

2008-12-20T18:48:00.000-08:00

There are more pictures..
just not in the blogging mood..

The Start Of the Holidays

2008-12-19T14:05:00.000-08:00

It started snowing at 11 and it hasnt stopped..
it is suppose to be the worst snow storm, Cobourg
has had for the last 2 years.

I wonder when it is gonna stop.
It is like a blizzard..
i didnt know it would be like that..

And, there was no school.
I was in the shower, when the radio
said"All Bus are cancelled"!come out of the shower
told my dad

And he told me, why dont you go to school
and check it..
im like, im not walking out there..
and went to my room, hoping to fall asleep
but couldn't..

Then, i tried again later, and i did,
slept till twelve.!

Anyway, i have holiday homework..
Thanks school!
-I have to finish to kill a mockingbird
-Finish 13 journals for to kill a mockingbird
-do four P.E Journal.
-Finish Twilight

Tonight, i'm gonna go to a Christmas party..
Lastly, Happy 14th Birthday to Darcy, the baby brother of mine!

If only dreams were reality

2008-12-17T16:05:00.000-08:00

I'm gonna sound like a stupid crazy fan/Stalker of this two dudes.
BUT,
OMG, I am in love with them.
Literally,I think about them all the time when i'm bored..
now, i really sound stalk-ish
I want to go to Taiwan and hopefully, get to see them!

anyway, this two dudes are Vaness Wu and Vic Zhou
I thought they were hot in my younger days..
They are still EVEN HOTTER minus the long hair for Vaness Wu!
Vic Zhou tho, is still cute with or without..that's my liking

Like i didn't know Vaness has like the sexiest abs i have ever see.
One word to describe it WOW!
But, i'm assuming his pictures was taken a year ago..

I didn't even know he had a piercing for his belly.
But still he still look se-xy!

Vic, does he remind you of someone..
someone called EDWARD CULLEN?
He looks so pale here..
so,ya he reminds me of Edward!
but still cute and hot as ever.

I guess this is the latest picture of them..
it is like their new album picture..

ok, im going to stop here..
i have to go study for my stupid science test..
I'm going skating tomorrow!
all worth the hard work..
i need to pass this test, to boost my mark up..
ok, I'm going to stop ranting on about crap..

LASTLY!
Good Luck friends with collecting your results.
I would love to be there when you guys get it!
but, sadly, i have school and not in Singapore!

11 more days to christmas!

2008-12-14T14:12:00.000-08:00

I'm sure everyone has heard of the 12 days of Christmas song.
Well, my English teacher found a really cool
version and showed it to the class!

There is also another one called the Lions sleep
tonight..it is really good too..

1 week to 3 weeks of holidays!
well, i won't count it as a holidays
since i still have to read To KILL A MOCKING BIRD!

Actually i find the book, quite interesting, just that
the way the character speaks in the book,
it is so hard to understand..
This is a phrase from the book by one of the Ewell
"Report and damned to ye!Ain't no Snot-nosed slut of a schoolteacher ever born c'n make me do nothin'! You ain't making me go nowhere,missus.You just remember that, you ain't makin' me go now her!"

So the book, is really racist, it talks about
how racist America was back in the time.
They still are in some places.

The Tom Robinson Trial was said to be
the most racist trial ever.
Since, there wasn't any American-black jury.
it wasn't fair to the blacks.

People would believe a white person word
over a black.
Just because,of skin color.
Mean or what!

And this guy,Atticus, white man.
Was his lawyer and so the whole town
was against him.

But, the reason why he took
Tom Robinson Trial was
because he knew he would not be able
to leave with himself
if he let an innocent man die.

So, im off to a christmas party
this week at Oliva..
and im excited for everyone
to tell me their N' level result

but, at the same time i have
a science test that very day..
Lucky oh me!

One really bad news,
GRANNY IS BACK AT THE END OF THE MONTH!
AHHHHH!!!!
Im going to die..

Oh, im gonna take some pictures of the decoration around town
and the puppies at the Humane Shelter!!

Random Moments of Nessa POO..AND ME!

Tootles:)

The wonders of the world

2008-12-10T20:17:00.000-08:00

The Dream.
it is so wonderful sang by Tiffany Alvord

I dont really what to say.
just that I'm just writing for the
sake of writing..

I just found out that i actually like
really loud and screaming songs
on Friday night, in the car,
Cree had her loud music on,
and i love them all

There is this show called Jon & Kate Plus 8
the show is so awesome
They have like 8 kids..
1 pair of twins and 1 pair of sextuplets
So, the twins are Maddie and Cara
the rest is Collin,Adaden,Hannah,Leah, Alexis and Joel

Crazy isn't it..
So,Maddie is like the bossy,drama queen, stubborn and
talkative
Cara is quiet and soft-hearted
Twins but both opposite..

i dont know about the rest because they are still too young
to know what their personality are like.

Twilight and Sleepover

2008-11-29T16:35:00.000-08:00

OMG,
I advise people who want to watch the movie..
Don't read the book first, or finish reading it.
Because there is so many scene in the book
that is not in the movie..

like i can seriously relate to the book,
but the movie i can't,they left so many scenes out..
They didn't even have Lauren in the movie..
like what the freak..

and i wanted to have the parts where the guys asked
Bella out, the only person shown was Mike.
AHHH!!so, i was like im hating this movie,
since i just read the first 214 of the book..

i was still reading the book when
we were in the cinema..
Then, after, it got to the part where i haven't
read the book, i just loved it..

i can like watch the movie again..
i cant wait till the second movie comes out..

After,the movie, Taylor and i slept at

Harinder's place,
and today, harinder and i
spent the whole afternoon watching
Parental Control!..

it was funny, and im home
now typing about Twilight..

Taylor thought that Emily Browning should play Bella..

She from A series of Unfornate Events.

What do you think?

Emily Browning

This is the Hunk..

I dont know if he makes out with Bella..

Taylor won't tell cause i told her not to ruin it for me..

but i want to know..

This dude plays Jacob Black..

Guess what He is 16..

can you believe it..

i can't!i thought he was freaking 18..

but no..

But,

This is him in Twilight!

Still a hottie, but i prefer the short hair.

anyway, im hoping to finish twilight

and start New Moon..

It is going to be exciting!

Twilight Rocks the week

2008-11-26T16:29:00.000-08:00

Twilight is out..

Woot,Woot,Woot..
but, i haven't read the book..
some people says it is good
some people says it is bad..

some people say dont read the book before watching..
because they leave alot of scenes out..

LIKE WTF?

i have tomorrow
to finish the book because
im watching the movie on Friday..

anyway, my love life has stopped..
it hasnt gone anyway,
wont be for a long time..

i haven't found a job yet..

but the Norththumberland Humuan society

has called me, and im going next Tuesday to volunteer
and take care of ANIMALS!
AHHAHAHHAH!

i really hope to meet new people..
it would be really great..
if i don't, i will just volunteer at the hospital..
which i can just do next year..

Oh, in families,we are going to start SEWING
bean babies..
Can't wait..
i have turn into a Old granny or a part-time housewife..
i just need my apron and that hairdo..
and i would pull it off..

Here are my knitting pictures..
I will have to take a picture of
the whole blanket
which is still being put together..

I finished watching Hana yori Dango..
and it is like not what i expect it would be..
i think i might watch the chinese verison..
but like Rui aka Vic Zhou is like damn not hot!
in the movie..

last time, he was when i was watching it 4 years ago..
but he has grown..
so now, i think he is not hot..
which bothers me alot..

This one is the lastest one
im doing..
it is almost done..

My Fourth square.

It was suppose to be all pink and white..
but i ran out of wool..

A white Snow drop.

2008-11-20T17:28:00.000-08:00

It was a blizzard outside yesterday..
was studying for science..
I'm so excited..
waiting for Ian to get his butt
to Cobourg next week
so, i can have a snow ball fight with him..

Oh, and it is ice-skating time..
i wonder how it is like ice-skating outdoors..
i will take pictures..

Came back from an hour workout..
wow!I'm going to have pipes man!
and Abs...haha..

anyways,my knitting is going so well..
you should see my 1st one and 2nd one
they are so different..
haha..

i gotta take pictures..
we are making blankets for the homeless..
I'm gonna make socks/scarf/ for daddy next Christmas..
that would be cool..

I'm so excited for this years chirstmas..
as, we got a present for daddy,
that i think he is gonna be really happy,
and might be one of his greatest Christmas ever

i will post pictures next time, if i have the time

I dreamt of a story like this

2008-11-19T19:00:00.000-08:00

I stand from far
Wondering who you really are

When will our path cross
But i guess that is the cost
for being a new kid

Will i ever be able to say
"Want to hang out?"

I sit and day-dream
the day you will notice me

I dream about the day
we would have lunch together

I dream of a day
we would talk for hours on the phone

I dream of you and me
walking down the halls together

I dream of being yours
and you being mine

I just dream of talking to you
so, i know,you know i exist.

It isn't hard to uncover
That
I'm surrounded by Lovers

It drives me nuts
and this cause a lot of cuts
in my heart

But, patient is the word
because i'm like a young bird
still learning how to survive

When my day comes
i will know he's the one

For now,
I can only dream of a story like this
one

Let it Snow,Let It Snow,Let it SNOW!

2008-11-18T18:34:00.000-08:00

OK..
It snowed today..
Which is awesome
but it was all gone when school was over..
it snowed while i was in Science and i
couldn't wait to get out of class to go jump in it!

I have like put in my resume at 7 places
i hope and pray that by next week
i would be hired!
i really really need
and want a job..

And Misha, you haven't been online..
i need to talk with you
about stuff about a certain someone..
hahah..
I guess your busy playing Sims 2..

School is plain boring as usual..
nothing new ever happens..
Give me a miracle or a surprise..
how can people go to such a boring school
or even live in a town that is so B-O-R-I-N-G.
Tell me, i dont get it!

I want to go back to Singapore..
I can't wait for 2 years to go by..
but like this 3years are going
to be a fucking waste of my teens years..
i could have done so many and much
more things in Singapore
than i can actually do here..

Why is life unfair?
Tell me?
:(

This week

2008-11-16T22:28:00.000-08:00

The boys are over,
tonight is their last night over..
but, omg, little kids can really
turn your house upside down..

Nessa and i vacuum our room
today,because there was so
much crams around..
by the afternoon it was full of
cookie crams again..

Mostly because of me,
bringing my snacks in my room..

but granny was really pissed off
today, she couldn't handle us..
so, she wanted Sandra to pick the boys up
she got Issac to call her..
but i guess she was moody since she
was partying the whole night..
and so she wasn't nice to granny..
so, She put her frustration on us..

I got to talk to dad today, which is great
I miss him dearly..
I want to bring my babies to Canada..
I miss them so much..

I scared that one day they might
leave this world and i won't be able
to be with them..
or get to bury them..

anyway, i have a physic test
tomorrow..
and i'm like freaking out..
because i still don't get how
to get Displacement..
i guess i have to go in at Lunch
and ask questions..
hopefully, that would help me pass..

OH, and i have an 84.8 average!
muhahaha
i just need to get an 85 average or more
to get a scholarship..!
for college but that is next year..
i hope i can maintain a 80 average!
through high school..---> main goal!

This week

2008-11-13T18:28:00.000-08:00

Their body is full of wording
from the song stronger
good workout too..

This week, has been a really busy week,
I have a science test tomorrow
but i don't have to go to class
because I'm going to a funeral..
Aunt Dorthy past away..
so, im save..
i get to do the test on monday..

then i had volleyball
OK,try-out for it..
but everyone is too freaking good..
like Olympics good..
but just just below them the Olympics people..

And, in families studies,
we are doing KNITTING!
i actually like knitting..
though, i have restart like over a zillion times!
cause i didn't like the fact it didn't look pretty..
but this is the last time I'm restarting!..haha

Today, this is workout thing,
my whole body is gonna be sore tomorrow..
and like I'm going to have a nice BO-DT
haha..
I will have muscles MAN!

The boys are coming over on Sat
they were suppose to come over tomorrow
but nooo..
grandma can't handle it..
Drives me nuts..

but like this week she has become really nice..
like she cooks breakfast for us everyday now!
it is really surprising..
last time, she won't even want to make Milo for me..

well,im gonna go knit now!

Letting the anger out

2008-11-05T18:09:00.001-08:00

Went, to freaking basketball practice
to find out we had a freaking practice yesterday
FUCK..
i'm like so pissed..
i went on Monday and realize there was no practice..
ok, fine..
but, Mr Cavanaugh
was like im playing the people who i think will help us win tomorrow and if you guys don't get to play, dont get upset
like how can you not feel upset, if you freaking like sit out the whole game..
like seriously, i have better things to do that sit there like an idiot and know
im not going to play, while i can be in science
learning about fucking hard physic..
which im still confused about..
but no, i have to go if not you would blame me for not having team-spirit..

lemme ask you a question
if your daughter was on our team and she sucked as bad as me..
would you have said that..
i bet you still put her on..
and you won't have let her stand in practice like an idiot or making her an extra!
like if you don't need me on the team say so, i would gladly quit!

How do you expect me to do my best, when your never
encouraging me,just putting me down..
you don't even give us tips on how we can improve..
just the good players get them..
well, guess what, if you don't want to treat me as if I'm a player on the team..
i would gladly overturn all the balls to the other team,they can win for all i care..
i not going to do that, cause there are girls on the team who deserve to go to Cossa.

This whole country is just plain mean, weird, competitive..
I applied at Zellers yesterday and the lady at the customer service wasn't even friendly..
the girls just bitch about each other like up at their face..
a girl is justing getting on my nerve..
people treat the really nice teacher like crap..
Like seriously, i hate it here, that is not even funny anymore..
like how do you have fun in a place you hate so much..

now, i know why all the people that go to Singapore
never want to come back to Canada again..
or miss Singapore..
because this fucking country is a pot-head country
full of rude,mean and impatient people!

I can't wait to get out of here in two years..
and never ever EVER EVER EVER come back again..
I seriously would love to fucking just screw the education
and go to freaking ITE..
cause i bet i would have a way more fun there than
im here..
PLus, i promise to study really hard an ACE all my exams
if daddy you let me go to ITE..
Like that is ever going to happen..

FUCK CANADA AND THE BITCHES AND BASTARDS WHO
LIVED IN IT!

The Talk during English

2008-10-28T20:18:00.000-07:00

During English, we had the funniest English class like time went so fast.. that was the first time, i didn't keep looking at the time the talk was about gossip girl about Jenny Humphrey and Nate Archibald Erika thinks that Jenny has become looks like a bitch now as she has too much make-up on. and a full bang. but i think she needs to lose the full bangs and she will look ok

But, Nate and Jenny make out..
OMG!
yes,OMG!
Jenny is like 15 in real life..what a lucky girly..
Im so obsesses with Gossip girl..
who wouldn't..

The other thing i wanna talk about is..
Doesn't Chace Crawford and Zac Efron
Look ALIKE!

ZAKKY BOY!

CHACE THE SEXY!

Dont they look alike..
Chace looks like the older verison of what zac
might look like at 23..
They both have the most gorgeous eyes..
nice hair..
and one hell of a sexy body..

This lead to a question of what we look for in guys
and this is what canadian girls want in a guy..
-has to be romantic
-has to know how to cook
-has to be sensitive
-nice butt
-blue eyes/nice eyes
-abs
-nice hair
-Smart
-Funny but not funny corky
-kind but not too kind
-Honest
-TALL
-Has to be zac efron, nick Jonas or Joe Jonas..

They said more, but i dont remember..
but i guess they want too much from guys..
and Tooo bad guys..
if you want a Canadian girl, you might not be able
to date her, because she has high expectation of ya..
and Mrs Armstrong was like,
when you grow up looks dont matter...
and you would look at his personality than his physical appearance..
and im hoping she is right.
-

STRESS!

2008-10-27T16:21:00.000-07:00

I'm freaking out..

I'm going to go apply at DQ tomorrow
and i have a basketball tomorrow..
Which I'm pretty sure I'm going to sit out
for the whole game or maybe get to play for 2minutes.
GAH!
and i have a song stuck in my head..
"Tell me something i dont know"
Ohya,HSM3 is Out..
WHOOP DIDO..
It came out on Friday..
And guess what!
My whole grade not including guys..
Were all excited to go watch it..
So imagine how much money the cinema people would earn?
TONS!
People here are totally crazy about it..
and guess what i sit next to a HSM 3 number 1 fan in English
I'm sure that would be the main topic tomorrow..
I'm actually more excited For Twilight to come out.
One last thing,
Kyle is going out with a girl from my basketball team.
Great, isn't it.
It always happens, the nicest guys are always taken
or EITHER GAY!
ARGH!,anyway, gossip girl is going to be on soon..
SO CYA!

Huggies & Kisses!

This weekend stuff and thoughts

2008-10-05T18:32:00.000-07:00

Look at these..
I love this 2 phones..
crazy over side slide phones..
I didn't think that samsung or Lg have
cool phones..seriously if you look at the
samsung or lg phones in singapore
they aren't attracted at all..

But the problem with these 2 phones is that
all the girls in Canada seems to have them..
and having something which everyone
has is not on my list..
i guess i just have to wait till the x1 comes out in singapore
then i would get it..
and hopefully
the x1 would come out a year later
after i got it..
and so i can get a new one before everyone
here has the same one as me..

Ever since, i got back from Camp Arowhon
I made a couple of new friends
and i went out with my new friends
to go 5pin bowling on Friday..
From like 4-2am..
hhaha it was pretty awesome..
there was a dance floor
but the entry fee was like 10 bucks
anyway, we got kicked off our bowling place
because we were too long at the dance floor
and the people gave our spot away..
and we still had 1 game left..
The funny thing is that we were surrounded
by middle school kids
and we were the only high schoolers

Before that, we went to East side Mario's for dinner
and i didn't have anything..
Tony was working
and he was our waiter for the day..
so, he was serving my friends their drinks..
WHEN HE ACCIDENTALLY SPLIT A DRINK
ALL OVER A FRIEND OF MINE..
i was shocked, laugh abit at her..
but seriously,
you should have seen
how she bitched at him
when he wasnt there..

Sam:He's not getting a tip from me
Sam:Nobody tip him..
Sam: Does he even know how count...he said i would get 6 slices of pizza
and i only got 4
Sam:im only going to give him 5 pennies
Tony:im really sorry..
Sam:It's ok..(smiling) he goes away
Sam:it is not ok..

what a bitch eh?
The girls here are really bitchy..
Someone gotta stop them
You don't even know if
your good friend is your friend at all.. t
he people i hanging out with..
was bitching about this other girl that
i thought that they were cool with..
but i guess not..

It scares me..
because im afraid to be bitched about..
so i have to learn not to
tell people about what i think..
then there wont be any rumors about me
or people secretly hating me..
actually not secretly..
they mostly likely but straight up with me
and tell it to my face that
they dislike my presence.

I think that girls here
have to go to Singapore and
have a cat fight with
all the Minahs..
I think that way they would learn..
or maybe not!

Huggies and Kisses

Days of my life

2008-10-01T20:14:00.000-07:00

The first of October man!
The month of lovely Halloween..

I havent talk to my dearest friend!
ok, i have alot of dearest friend..but this one is kinda special..
in my way..
anyway,
for 3 weeks..
top-up your card, you say..
but when..when??
im waiting patience-ly!
but my patience is running out..

im trying to move on from you to some other dude..
there is a cute dude, but the problem is i don't see him daily..
which sucks..
and the cool thing is that he isnt in the popular group..i think
which i guess makes it easier to make friends with him..
yes, i havent even said a word to him before..
but, a friend is trying to help me..haha..

I watched the house bunny yesterday with Morgan, Connie and Kari..
Thought, ya, it would be an interesting movie..
and ya,it was..
but, what was the point of the movie..
it had no meaning to the whole movie
and also it keeps us girls dreaming..
wow, if i go to college..i can join some sorority and tons of guys would love me..
dream on..
it making fun of all blondes..though, there is a saying of "Dumb blonde"
and some blondes arent dumb..
but, i have some positive comments and that the girls are actually really hot after
their makeover..
it is actually funny and i like it when she remembers peoples names by saying it using a deep deep voice..
you gotta watch it to find out what happen!haha

I seriously cannot wait for this movie to come.
when i left for singapore in June..
the Sign said "coming soon"
and im back here 3 months later and it still
have yet to be shown!
anyway, i cant wait..

Signing off..
Hugs & Kisses

Random thoughts

2008-09-30T19:24:00.000-07:00

I was going to blog about this a few days back..
but was too lazy too..

Ok, i dislike the fact that some girls get so angry..
not so angry..
but VERY ANGRY over some thing that they need no get angry over..
seriously, it is your decision to make on whether you want to model an adult mag for them..
there is no pressure..just delete the freaking email and move on..
They were just trying to get you irritated and guess what, they sure did do a good job at it.
actually, you should have just play along and reply ya.."i would totally do it.."
and just play along till the jokes end..
where is your sense of humor?
dont have one..i suggest you go get one!

The fact about being grossed out about this,
is just immature..
cause well, first of all
your not even doing the shoot for them..
GOD!

The Realistic Dream

2008-09-14T18:51:00.000-07:00

A dream i had on friday..
it felt so real!when i woke up i was like omg!i cant believe it was a dream!

the dream was about a guy i like and me!haha
go figure out!haha
anyway,i met his older sister and his younger brother..
but he is the oldest among five of them!
so ya..
the brother had a note written on some electronic device..
but, i didnt get the whole thing..
anyway, their dad was there and they didnt want him to read it and
so they couldn't show me the note again.
but, before we left for his place.
his sister ask me"what did u do to him?"
i didn't get her question!

when i arrived at his place, his mum asked"why is she here?"referring to me
cuz i actually got on her bad side in real life..
i didnt say goodbye to her before leaving his place
and so she got mad!
(back to the dream)
so i was quite upset..
so he came home and he hugged everyone..
and i sat at the table..Thinking to myself i hope he sees me..
he comes over and gives me a hug..
it was a pretty long hug!haha
his mum was thinking to herself "i guess they are closer than i thought they were"

anyway, we wanted to the entrance of his bedroom
and we were going to go in when his mum said we couldnt go in..
then next moment, we were on the couch under the blanket..
and we KISSED!!KISSED!!
the kiss is the one that felt so real!
anyway, the lights went out and he wanted to kiss me again..
but i said "no, we are going to get caught!"
and then the lights came on and my hands are covering my faces.
and i woke up!haha

though, this is great to me, i cudn't stop thinking about it that day!
but, the sad thing is he hasnt reply my msg at all.
it is depressing and i dont know when to call home
and if i wanna call him, i got to wake up at 9 in the morning
as i have a better chance knowing that he is still awake!
but i miss him tons..
and i want to speak with him!
but, maybe he misses me
and decide it is best not to speak to me
cause it might make him sad!
~~argh! i dont know what to think~~
im trying to keep this off my mad
as i get so upset just thinking about him!

"I know you think I see you as just a friend

but do you know you make my heart bend

I don't want to keep these feelings inside,

they just keep hitting me like a tide
I think about you everyday
And oh,how I long to say,"I Love you"

But for now we are just friends,

until the day this act can end

And I can say "We aren't just friends"

The First week of School

2008-09-04T18:04:00.000-07:00

The First week of school didn't go so well.Usually, when it is day 1 of the school year!im always so excited that i can't get to bed!but this year..it changed, i was very tired and not very excited.i was actually very nervous, who is going to be in my class and who am i going to be seating with in class.

So, the first and second period didn't go to well.Cause, i walked through the hall like a total loner and then i sat in class and was talking to no one!It was quite upsetting!Then 3rd period came..which is after lunch..Ms armstrong called my name, and to my amazement!Jaime and Amanda were like EXCITEDLY:"Heidi" and waving..haha..it made me really inside happy and made me smile for a moment or so!then chris was like i missed you over the summer, Heidi..that made me laugh and smile even more..But, he said that he was kidding!hahha..

At 4th period, Emma was in my class and she was excited to see me and so was i..cause she is the only one who actually speaks to me beside Jaime and Amanda.I was happy that she was sitting next to me, but then it was the wrong seat and so, she moved to the right side of me but one seat down..cuz we were sitting in rows!so ya!

But, people are starting to talk to me, and me too..but, i still wander the hall by myself..it sucks!
anyway, Camp Arowhon is in a few weeks and im excited for it..i really hope to get some good friends there! people who like hanging after school and love sports..but anything would do!

But, daily, i still miss Singapore!i think about YOU GUYS everyday..when im doing nothing, nessa keeps reminding to stop thinking about it..and i to her, cause we can't stop thinking about what happened in Singapore and the more we think the more we get depressed..and lately, we keep on listening to emo song, UNLIKE MR TS WHO IS NOT EMOTIONAL DEPRESSED!LIKES LISTENING TO EMO SONG..I DO ANYTHING, TO TAKE THE PAIN IN MY HEART AWAY!BE A HAPPY ME, LIKE SECONDARY 1 OR 2!!

I think that pain in my heart is the reason why i don't like anyone, it just hurts to much..i have been hurt so badly by a love one that it is going to take forever to heal!GOD, that sucks!

A day of boredom at my place!

2008-08-30T09:37:00.000-07:00

Save the funniest for last!
.

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
TADAH!

hahahaahahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhahhahahahhahahahhahahahhahah

3 fucked up days

2008-08-28T07:05:00.000-07:00

The pain in my heart, hurts so badly!
i just want to cry and scream!
but, the tears are coming out!
I can't stand my granny and my mother!
Is god testing me?

Dad is coming 2 Canada this Tuesday!
then leaving on the 1st week of October
i rather go to boarding school,
no need to face my granny, dad, mum..
just looking at them gives me stress

I dont know what i did but i got hit right back in the head really badly.
I wanted to meet zul!but, daddy said i had to go to ahma house..
i was freaking upset, though, i met him the day before!
ok, then i had to cancel it, went back to my place, but at the interchange
i met junlong and omg, the moment was damn awkward, that we didnt even talk to each other.
then went home, Johnthan,Aizat and Yu Nong were all asleep, being me, i decide to disturb them!haha..then dad came in and shouted, that they had to go home.
Sent them to the bus-stop, before that johnthan puked!haha

Went to eat dinner with the family, dad shouted/screamed/yelled at Vanessa and Me.
everyone was just looking at us, but, it didnt embarrass me that much and same goes to nessa..
i was so emotional, i called qijie, and my 5sec into the convo, my credit finished!
ate my dinner, then i walked as quickly as i could to my granny place, not even taking the lift..climb the stairs to 6th floor!
after that everything was fine, daddy said my friends could come to the airport..so i was damn happy..i called zul thinking that i was going to be at ahma places for a long time..but a few minutes into the convo, my parents said we were leaving!like wtf!
so, i told him that i wud called him when i get home!
I brought yu nong into the house while packing and after that i called zul!
we talked for about an anhour or so then we put down..
it was quite sad, it was even sadder when he said" i dont want to talk with you on the phone, because we never finish what we are talking!, i prefer face to face because then we finsh what we are talkin."
It was upsetting!

i was having tons of fun, we went to pick up misha,shikin and aizat.and by the time we reached home, it was 230..and we wasted so much time fighting with darcy to go shower.
We got into trouble cause daddy was losing his Patience.

Arriving at the airport, we had to Q up to check-in.Daddy shouted at the policewoman, cuz the agent didnt tell him to bring the letter from the school, two days in a row, but was that i wasnt very embarrass and later i told her we are canadian citizen, she was like" why didnt you say earlier."
After putting the luggages into the car, i was told that my friends wud come later, the 2nd trip..
then when we are almost to the airport, that asshole mother of mine,told me she is not bringing them to the airport anymore..i broke down in tears

After that, we procceed to go to the check-in luggages counter.I borrow dad phone to call logita.
she told me she was with nessa, i was so excited to see her, that i cried again at the counter. after they gave us my passport, i walked quickly to her, at the same time crying.Thanks for coming girl, i appericate the hug and the comforting words!well, she was with me, i called my 4 friends up to see how they were doing, crying the whole time.Misha also started crying,couldnt control myself.

I said bye to them and apologize because of my stupid mother.then i hugged logita bye,cuz she had to leave.We went outside the terminal to wait for that fucker!cuz she wants to hug me and darcy goodbye..then nessa told me the most cruel thing..

VAnessa and my friends version
That fucker upon arriving home saw my friends and nessa friends ask them what they were still doing here, told them to leave because my dad would get mad if he still see them here!Afny i love you for taking care of my friends..cab with them to mrt cause she felt sorry and pity for them..

The fuckers version
i wanted to send them to the airport but they didnt want me too..i knew it was a lie, but i didnt bother to shouted/scream at her..

anyway, i was planning to just walk away and not hug her.but i didnt do it, cuz im not a daredevil.so i hug her goodbye with attitude and god she hugged me tight.
we walked away without saying one last bye!

cried abit on the plane. thinking about what happened at the house.

When we arrived in Canada,saw uncle ed, he looked like a drug dealer..it was funny!
step into the world most smelliest car, my granny's car!puked 15minutes left of the drive to granny's.

saw shawnyce working and wanted to go see her, Darcy and i were like freaking happy!but then we got into a fight as he didnt want to wait for me. was about to leave for Cree's place when i saw granny, i should have walked away, without asking her if i could go over.
I asked her, can i go over to Cree's place
she was like no
I:why?
SHE:dont agrue with me.

pissed off went into my room.then, later, i gave her my attuide and when she was talking to me, she was like I'm sick, she wants me to care for her, but she doesnt care about other people.then, all her negativity came out.

She and that fucker can find a house together and gossip to each other about it!

where can i run away from all of this!then she told me im here to study and nothing more..
i feel worst than i was last time.i feel like im in a freaking prison!i can't wait till she leaves/dies.i wont even drop a tear for her!mayb i wont even attend her funeral that stupid fucker!
i have to live with her for 10months, how am i going to tahan her!

Her house smell really bad from the cigarettes and the kitchen is freaking messy, i guess, she is waiting for us to clean it for her, as always. I can wait till Nessa gets back from the boy's place!

What a long post and finally im done!

That feeling in me

2008-08-22T03:24:00.000-07:00

There is only 5 more days till i get on the Northwest plane with DARCY! Part of me wants to leave and part of me wants to stay. Firstly, cause i have feelings for this one guy, well,actually,i'm to sure myself if i really really have feelings for him. But, i guess when it is time to go, it is time to go.. Time can't stop and so won't growth. i guess it is the same way as dying, when it is time for us to leave this world, we have to go. As, im typing, it feels as if i my heart is being crushed. Cause i feel the pain.

Tuesday
Anyway, my mums has decided to go to family court and wrote a freakishly long letter to the judge, though, i nv saw this letter, i was told it stated alot of horrible/negaitive Nonsense.Maybe some might be true. When, i heard about this, i was eating dinner with Nessa and Afny.The whole thing just ruin my whole mood, luckily i finished eating!I started crying abit, and Nessa was there to comfort me.I dont know what i would do when you graduate!I love you dearly. Then, i just listen to "One step at the time" over and over again being so upset that i was not in reality cause i almost got burned by her cigarette cause i came to close to her.

Wednesday
I got scolded by a women whom i call my mother. I walked out of the house without telling her and she made me miss my bus and so i had to run/walk all the way to sunplaze. I'm not crazy, it is what i call a good workout! It is took me about 20minutes to walk there.while, she was scolding me, i was thinking why does she want to act like my mother when i go out but when Darcy asked her for money, she told him to go ask dad. I mean wtf? anyway, when she scolds me, i tend to laugh/giggle.

What do you guys think of these houses in Canada?

House A

House B

House C
This house was on Sale, but guess wad it is worth HALF A MILLION DOLLAR!
some rich ass person bought it!
I know the outside doesn't look appealing but you show look in the inside.
it is damn gorgeous and it has an indoor swimming pool!
The best part is that it is located next 2 the beach and so you have a nice view of the sunset and rise!

House D
House E

Promoting A friend outta laughter

2008-08-05T10:00:00.000-07:00

I have this friend
who doesnt like her boyfriend anymore,
because they dont talk and communicate at all
she finds him boring and afraid to dump him.

SHE:
*laugh at her own lame joke
*weird
*Her name is IMA..
*she has a cool hairdo
*CRazy at times
*( like scratching her butt at the most random places)has a very itchy butt!!

Now, she want to date a guy OR GIRL
*he/she must be tall
*He/she must be funny
*Talks like how i talk, but know when it is time to shhhh!
*Finally,she/he has to be Chinese
she abit racist

so hurry up!cuz she mite change her mind,and just stay single.

see i told u i wud be posting this up!!!

2008-08-04T19:27:00.000-07:00

Haven't blogged for a month!
but, im back.!
Summer has been plenty Awesome so far!
I have only 21 days left in Singapore before i leave.
and Summer is almost over, time has gone really fast!
I need the time machine now!

Meet up with friends, there are some i really want to meet before
leaving and have yet to meet up with them.

So on Friday and Saturday, i went over to Misha's place for a sleepover.
had tons of fun, with nabilah,Misha's sister and misha herself.
when i went home the next day, in an extremely happy mood, i got scolded not only by my mum but my dad.
Dad was pissed at mom as usual, so being me, i tried to calm him down but he told me to go away.(he actually said more than that)
Then, got my dinner, went to the office and being her usual naggyself.

*ME Sounding annoyed the whole time
Mum:How come your back so late.
Me:It's only 10, ok what!
Mum:ya, but your gone for two days,so you should have come home earlier today!
ME:what for it is not like im going to be doing anything useful at home, so i stayed at her house.
Mum:you guys are driving me nuts!and now your dad doesn't want to go to Brunei.
Me:SO?
MUM:What so, who is going to do the workshop now?
ME:why are u blaming me, what has he not going to brunei got to do with me.
MUm:(silents)

Called Vanessa, to see if she was anywhere close to Sembawang because i didnt want to stay at home!Went to the buckaroo jungle place Beach. Was told it was Haunted!
but i didnt see anything.I scanned around trying to freak Vanessa's friends out by saying, I saw something.Then, i actually saw something but it was a tent, from far it looks like three floating clothes!..

This friday, we are heading off to Sentosa..WOOT!!
Then, gonna watch the fireworks at Esplanade if NAbilah decides to come with us, instead of going with that PERSON!he is totally ruining the plan!

I was bored yesterday and decided to edit HIS PICTURE!Im think im finally over him, but, he still remain deep down in my heart!
We are still friends, and i hope that i will get to meet you on Orientation day before i leave!

2008-07-04T14:11:00.000-07:00

AFter that long wait!
I have Finally turn 16!
I can totally get my driver's Ed when i get back..
but then it cost alot of money because of the
freaking insurance and so..
i wud have to wait till im 18 which is 2 years more to wait
but it is worth the wait..

ANyway, we went to Induglz for dinner!
the food was freaking delicious
that i burn my mouth even after blowing at the food
a couple of times!
but, that is the 1 restaurant i have been to
that took forever to serve their drinks!
overall, it was awesome..

now, i dont feel like leaving Singapore!
only because i have all my darlings here and
cuz that naggy old woman is back there..
whu is always spoiling my mood!

there is a month and a week left till i leave!
and it is going to fly by so quickly!
hopefully, my time in canada wud flyby faster this year!
then before i noe it i wud be back in Singapore again..celebrating my 17th birthday

2008-06-22T22:14:00.000-07:00

THE SSA SQUAD,SHAWNY,MOI!

I totally did so badly for math.. i think it was 89 or something and it dropped to a 76..fuck man..
i got like a 55 on the freaking EQAO..and now i need a 80 and more which i doubt would get..
i praying so hard that i wud get an honor roll..
cuz i really worked hard to maintain an 80 for my main courses..

ANYWAY I'M BACK IN SINGAPORE IN 3 DAYS..FUCK YA!!

anyway i have, a geography exam 2moro..good luck to me and then no more examz!

OMG, i went to Cree's party yesterday and it was off the hook..
made out with 2 guys..1 gay and 1 straight..haha..
IT IS A long story..
and i have to go to bed..
and so i would post the long story 2moro..
which mite only be 3 sentence..haha

GOOD LUCK 2 ME ON MY EXAM!!
and hope everything wud go smoothly at HEATHER's 2moro!

2008-06-09T20:56:00.000-07:00

Fuck the weather is getting hot!!
omg, i had frozen yogurt, the other day and ever since that day,
im been craving for more..haha

This week is going to be chaotic.!
-First, Romeo and Juliet scene questions are due
-Second,opinion essay on R&J are due
-Third,EQAO papers are on thursday, pray hard that i would get an 80% so i can examined!
-Fourth, my fucking board game is due!..next tuesday!
god!!but i psyched about 15 days left till i board that plane..
but i'm even more excited to go to Cree's party next weekend!

Talking about Romeo and Juliet..
not the one with Leonardo DiCaprio
but some other guy that looks like Zac efron!
anyway, we saw his butt, all the girls were flattered by it..
wanted the same scene to be played again..haha..
but too bad for the guys that they couldn't really see her boobs as it was too quick..

I watched another movie called "Stay Alive"
fuck it was based on a freaking true story..
haha.i tend to like researching on the movies i have watched!
The lady called Countess Bathory..Research her!
omg, the woman was in the Guinness World record for the most people killed..
very horrifying!i mean she killed only woman and young girls..
torture them, by poking them with needles, hot sticks, beating them to death..
even draining them..cut of their fingers..
fuck wad a cruel woman..and she was one of the most powerful woman in Hungary
and so the peasant she kidnapped couldn't report her..
and after all she had done, only her accomplices would torture while she wasn't..

The party

2008-05-23T14:18:00.000-07:00

Cree's party was off the hook!

Met the weird,funny, interesting and new people..
Sneaked out of the house
Meet this guy Paul, and we started talking
and i met mike,god the kid was drunk and he was acting like a 12 year old..
but he was funny..though,he kept on asking what my name was..
we decide to go get pizza..
drunk people can be the most random people ever.
they started talking to random people..
decide to go hit on some girls..
went back to Cree's house
and just hang there..
it was "nice" of shawnyce to invite me to sit with her even though the couch was already full of people..
i ended up siting on a guy lap..shawynce and a dude got up..
Heidi:ok now i can sit on the couch..pheww!! Shawynce:No,heidi..you have to stay on..Mich come sit on the couch..
THe dude:i have to go,give me a kiss.
fine.i gave him a kiss on the cheek but shawynce decides i shud give him a kiss ON THE LIPS.. i was like no, and then i finally gave in..and ya..
watch people do the nastiest thing..well, it is common in a way..(misha, u get what i mean)
was grossed out by it..
was so tired,had to wait for nessa to finish making out with this guy before we left.
at 415..
sneak back into the house,only to be caught by granny..
darn it!!
but it was worth it..
hopefully,i wud be able to go for another party again!!

2008-05-13T21:21:00.000-07:00

*Si Hua i have finally link you..

Back in Singapore in like 1month and a few weeks. cant wait man..
watched shawny played against Clarke yesterday..
was freezing and so i used her shirt to cover my hands but was still freezing tho..
i heard from Katie,
that i cud sign up for a foreign exchange student i was like so Excited..
i want to go to Japan,France or maybe Gremany..
seems awesome man..

The most shocking thing was when she told me that she likes Asians..
SHE THINKS THEIR CUTE..haha
She think White people are ugly..haha
and her goal for next year is to date one..haha
And not only her there are alot of girls who wants to date an Asian.. haha..
They all want to come to Asia..people..!!
I want to get over and done with this week..
im so worried about this meet..
i want to get into the top 8 which i doubt i would..
i want to run my best though and prove that
i can actually run quickly if i push myself..
everyone looks down on me and even i,myself am looking down on myself..
*sobs..

I miss Singapore..AHHHHH!!!
anyway, i manage to find some new anime to keep me occupied.. but since they are new..
i have to wait every week for them.. and they only aired 5 episodes for the 3 anime i want to watch..GRRR.. and so i have 20 more to go..
Vampire Knight,Itazura Na Kiss and Special Kiss..
The funny thing is that Cree watches IT started with a kiss the Taiwanese Drama..

Oh, i watched Emma and Sofie sing Falling Slowly.. and god..they are really good singers.. especially,sofie..her voice so good.. too bad i didn't get to know her better..

Jaime K..The principal's daughter is cool but annoying but she the only one
who has been really nice to me..
when im by myself she always inviting to come sit with her group of friends..
but i was a total bitch toward her by not voting for her as sercertary but she won in the end.
haha..im hoping to maybe become good friends with her..
but i doubt that would ever happen.
i can't wait for Camp Arrowhan where i see my camp mates..
Now making friends doesn't bother me anymore
as i dont know..
but i dont like the fact that i'm stuck at home doig nothing..
Now, i'm the only home..
Darcy and Vanessa are both out..
Lucky Bitches..
i guess that my karma for making fun of both of them.
i was the first one to make friends
but the last one to get hang out friends..

What a nice week to start off..

2008-05-05T17:27:00.000-07:00

I have so many things that i want to write out,scream,say and laugh about..
but just need that person to be around me..
grrr.. Zachary poor guy..lost his 2 front tooth, he looked really weird and he got a buzz cut..
but he still look cool..
i'm doing way better in track now.
my time was 45sec for 200m..
im hoping to come in the same time with denika.
it would be cool..
i keep letting my imagination get the better of me..
i thought maybe that shawynce and i would become better friends..
but so far, i have been asking her if she wanted to go for a run and we haven't gone for one..
i just waiting for her to reply which i doubt she would..No surprise there..

Tuesday
Got tons of homework to do..as i have a track meet 2moro
i'm sure that it is going to be my last for this year..
running the 800m..whoo!!not..
For missing school, i got tons of homeowork to do..
my english essay, nearly done..
plus, that book cover of Romeo and Juliet..
Geography,no instruction given and was told to just do it..
no surprise..
and math..God, got to start doing them soon..cuz i have to be at skool by 645!!!
645 man
and i made myself look like a total fool..
i smiled at my friend while talking to her..
wasn't done talking and i turned away still smiling and i came face to face with this hottie
he looked at me, and i was still smiling,so i thought maybe i'll smile at him
and he didn't smile back..
i hope maybe he thought i was smiling at my friend who was behind him..
he is not a complete stranger, he is on my track team..
i never even thought he was hot and took notice of him before..
which i usually do when there is a hottie..

O well, im always embarrassing myself..
Not that i want to always be embarrassing myself..

*I love thee, I love but thee
With a love that shall not die
Till the sun grows cold,
And the stars grow old...

2008-05-02T03:21:00.000-07:00

The fucking blogskin took me forever to edit..
and it still isnt right..God!!
anyway..went for my 1st ever track & field race in Ottawa..
The ride there sucked..cuz i cudn't sleep as i got the worst spot ever..
they put on Panic Room but i wasn't in the mood to watch it..
Finally,we arrived..
Saw no hotties..
it was awesome..
I had butterflies in my stomach,seeing all the runners warm up..
I ran the 400m within 85sec..Mr crooks kept cheering me on to finish the race, 50m left in the race, i wanted to quit.
when i saw how many seconds i was behind another girl..i was mad..i was a sec behind..Darn it..
im quite happy because i didn't come in last..
but 2nd second last..
i saw 2 guys who ran like a lightening..it was so quick..
i was done for the day at 1.45 pm..
i had to wait till 6 till we leave..
but,time went really quickly..
6 we left, and the ride back wasn't exciting either..i was restless..kept on turning side to side..
The movie they played The Gladiator wasn't the least bit interesting..
So, i tried sleeping and looking at Zachary..God, he is hot and pretty blue eyes..(a whole new story on why i'm so fascinated by his eyes)
we arrived at Belleville thinking it was Cobourg..and then i realize it wasn't and we had an hour more to go before we arrived in Cobourg..
went back to sleep,was about to fall asleep when we finally arrived in Cobourg at 1030..
was so freaking tired but had to complete my geography poster..told nessa to glue everything and went to bed..
Found out i freaking blew my geography test..the mutiple choice was the one that made me do bad..the definition was so hard to understand and some of the words weren't even part of what we learnt..Fucker..he is going to make me lose my honor award!!!im only at a 80.5 average..1.0 to let me drop..
though, it wasn't a very good day..i made new friends..and shawnyce is coming back tomorrow,so i can go hang with her,and go for a ran..woohoo!!

2008-04-22T18:37:00.000-07:00

was hoping that reading people's blog
they would cheer me up over my boring day in school
& my math mid-term test tomorrow
but was totally not unstress or happy after reading them..
everyone was stressing over their mid-term too..GOD!!
or either it was to emo..
thanks..i so needed a emo blog to help me make myself more unhappy than i already am..

St Mary's or Cobourg West
which to pick man..
St Mary is a good way to restart my school life again..
but im afraid that i might just end up not having anyone to hang with like now..
but the good thing is i get to wear uniforms..
I'm not weird anything..but having to stress over wad to wear in the morning
whether it is appropriate anot..such a hassle
i have better things to stress about..
Cobourg West tho..nothing interesting about..
just same old..BORING!!

I sit and think and think..
i do so much thinking now..
but im so much closer to sassy pants..haha

My mood isn't on studying rite now..
soon, i wud be back where i started..
my hardwork gone down the drain

but,i guess i just have to remember
heidi,you have to get good marks to beat becca..hahaha
good encourageement isn't it..
Miss Rebecca,so much..i really wish she was here with me
helping me with my work
my weird smart buddy..

I just have to think..2 more months man..
and then my happiness will come bak..

but then again 2months isn't long..
Pray for me guys that..after the summer i will have better days in skool
No more lonely as i walk in the halls..
No more walking by myself as we go places..
No more sad face..
Hopefully,getting a job would help me!! just a hangout friend wud do..
i'm not going to be chossey..
i have already learn my lesson..
NEVER DITCH A PERSON..NO MATTER HOW ANNOYING SHE IS!!
cause i now know how they are suffering..
:(

2008-04-21T16:31:00.000-07:00

The weekends, boring as usual..
Schedule for the day..
-Homework..tons!!
*Spelling
*Summary for Tom finder
*study for geo Test
*Study for Math
to lazy to do everything..
Friday..Running club!!Hurray..
Mr.Crooks is signing us up for competition and i didn't want to go
because i'm the slowest in the team..though,my time for 3km is 23mins..it is still very slow..
so i asked him
H:so events is like competition rite??
MC;Yap..
H:So,will i get to go for the competition?(suppose to sound like i didn't want to go)
instead i sound so desperate to go..GRRRR!!!
MC:we'll see..
H:*Totally embarrasses!!
How stupid can i sound..
But,to lighten up my day..
Yesterday,spent almost the whole day watching movies on the internet..after talking to MISHA for 3hours..(random talk as usual)
Since,the snow has all melted.. we open the window,guess what NO WIND coming in..instead i heard noise..REALLY NOISE..KPO me..i wanted to find out who was making the noise..
And was shocked to find out it was 4 dude..far far right across from us..
so i spy on them..and i told my sisters..and we were surprise that there were other teenagers living here...
Have no mood to do my work..I want to just take a walk or be by myself.. talk to someone..
the worst part, there is this really naggy woman in the house who is never satisfied with what my siblings and i do for her..
ARGH!!
tomorrow is another day and i don't want to go to school..i want to be like sleeping beauty,sleep forever..i wanna take a sleeping pill..

GOSSIP GIRL

2008-04-04T15:13:00.000-07:00

Gossip girl has just been rocking my world..
Though,the story totally talks about people in CIS..
epecially people like jade G.
but,the actress are way better than wad that Jade G.
has to show off.
i mean blaire is just a cool,mean,bitchy girl..BUT DAMN PRETTY..
Serena use 2 be bitchy..but just drop dead gorgeous ..wish i was in her shoes..haha
jenny is innocent makes me jealous that Eric has the hots for her..plus,she totally looks cool in a dress.
Dan awesome yet,such a hottie..nice and friendly..
Nate such a cool dude..cute and handsome..put together..haha..
Chuck such a perf..BUT he is so damn cute..

Watch it..it totally cool..imagine people living in hotels..all the awesome clothes u get to see...

2008-04-01T21:43:00.000-07:00

GOD..
Just as i thought this week could be one of the better week..
i hit in the face planted with the word "wrong"..
i was complaining saying "oh i dont wanna go to skool,it is holiday or im sick"
all this crap..hoping to con my dad..
no such luck..I mean i use to LOVE SKOOL..like seriously,it was really fun but then
i changed skool after another and then people i met were mean and snobbish..
and i just hated skool and still do..
maybe college or University would be better..
i so didn't want to go to school on Monday..
An Almighty person up someone decides..
"ok,i pity heidi,since she hates going to skool,no one to really talk to,
so lets give her a really good monday".
i was put in the same group with my crush..!!
Thought to myself,*this cud be better than i thought*
Happy as ever..EYE CONTACT and ALL..*Giggles..
That nite,i was in a rush for it to be tuesday because i would get to spend time looking at my crush..
but the almighty person decides..
i think heidi has had enough fun on monday that we shall make tuesday a terrible day for her
...muahaha...
well,thanks it was..
1)my dad is leaving 2moro 4 singapore..*sobs..
2) Being Retarded me, my imagination got the better of me..i let it rid wild..
making myself think that my crush actually likes me becuz of the eye contact we have..
but,guess wad no eye contact today!!!
but i have this REALLY REALLY Huge feeling that this guy likes this girl..
cuz when i looked at him,he was like starting at her
and he even asked her out of the 3 girls..
"why didn't you guys just say that u didn't like the script"
"Lucas, is such an idiot"
he just looked at her..i dont noe but it is cute tho..haha
3)my geography teacher is like a homework printing machine..Homework!Homework!
everyday!!and he doesn't not give us homework..sometimes i dont know how it even relates to geography..BUT THE WORST PART, it that you put all your effort and hard work into it..HE DOESNT FREAKINF COLLECTS IT..He collects something that you have no clue what the heck it is..Idiot..
but im in a rush to head for geography because during work period.My crush talks to me, and thats is when eye contact starts again..but,whatever..i dont want to think to fair..
it just breaks my heart..
Im trying to get into shape and build my stamina for running..
We were so bad,like seriously, this really cute guy was laughing at my sister and i because we were slow runners and cuz we kept walking..
i think,we are the only people who are like this..
OMG,WHAT A EMBARRASSMENT!!

2008-04-01T18:52:00.001-07:00

This girl is from my skool..i think she looks like a barbie doll.. she looks good in person and in picture..and best of all..she quite nice..I NOT A LES..BUT THE FIRST TIME I SAW HER I WAS LIKE WOW..SHE IS DROP DEAD GORGEOUS..OK,i sound like im have a crush on her..EWWW..i just like how she is so pretty..WHAT DO U THINK??

Feelings inside

2008-03-29T00:00:00.000-07:00

Ya’ll know what..

I don’t get my feelings at all

Like seriously..

What the fuck is wrong with me?

Can’t I just fucking like 1 guy..

Well, anyway..Lucas..

MYOHMY..

The dude with the gorgeous eyes..

Our eyes always meet when he talks or I talk in geography..

It is really sweet..

But then again,he might be thinking I’m staring at him..

Got that before and I don’t wanna let the guy know that I like him..

Sometime,I catch him looking at me..but who knows he might be looking at

The pretty girl behind me(if there is one)..or my imagination is just running wild again.

Hopefully, this time it won’t be that easy for my secret to get out..

Somehow I can’t even keep my own secret kept inside..

The dude I like always ends up finding out.. Don’t they rite...???

But they find it out from me.. The admirer..

But anyway, he didn’t show up to school today..

Was dolling up to look good for him..but was all crush and wasted

When he didn't show..feel sad and bored..

Bored nah.. wasn’t that much..i’m hoping to get closer to Rebecca..

Hopefully, we would become buds at the end of the semester..

But,I was like really sad..all,I could tell myself was I have to wait 3days to see

Him, his gorgeous eyes and awesome smile.

I Just really hope I cud become closer to him..

My heart sank when he waved goodbye to me on Thursday..

But,I guess he was being friendly..

Argh!!I don’t know.. Too much things to worry about..

1) trying to get hangout friends..

2) Complete 1 tasks..haha..

What was I going to write about..Fuck..i forgot..darn it..i guess im too tired and upset

to think..gtg ya’ll..

hoping my dreams are really sweet tonight..hehe.:)

From my heart

2008-03-25T22:26:00.000-07:00

I dream about you from a far distance

But I don’t think you know of my existence

Till now or maybe never.

We were group together to perform,

You made me smile with your smile,

And laugh at each sentence you say.

Girls love talking to you.

Your like their best bud.

I envy them, and hate them.

My heart breaks into big gigantic pieces

Whose heart breaks like that.

I wonder,do I really like you.

Or it is because of your looks..

I have to agree with your sentence today.

Heidi “why did I buy you?”

Adam “Because of my good looks?”

Heidi “No,Wasn’t it because you were on sale?”

The question has been changed.

It is because I liked you from the moment

I knew you were really funny.

I wish you would talk to me like we know each other for a long time

But i think i'm asking for alot.

Since we only just met a month ago.

Cause, I need someone to talk 2.

But, you wont understand

Because we are from two difference background..

Maybe some day you would be mine.

But, I hoping we would be just friends.

Cause, a friend like you is hard to find.

So, I’m hoping to keep it this way.

Till we speak again,

I shall think about kissing you under the rain.

Ewww..Just a thought guys..

2008-03-21T14:00:00.000-07:00

THIS IS seriously hasnt been one of my BEST week..
OMG!!i seriously hate her man!!wad is her problem..I mean like, you get freaking annoyed easily..SO wad, if tell me that your dating NORMAN, and I GOING TO RUB IT IN UR FACE..
cuz u said u nv will date him as he is a player..And guess wad, u change ur mind..I'm LIKE THIS
I LIKE RUBBING IT IN PPLE FACE..DEAL WITH IT..
The fact that your quite dumb cuz i noe ur secret already too bad i have to keep it on a downlow
if not i wud be a bitch and spread it really quickly..i call u my friend and i dont think u treat me as
urs...
THE FACT THAT U WANNA BLOCK ME ON UR MSN,JUST BECUZ, IM GOING 2 ANNOY U..WAD ARE U GOING TO DO WHEN SOMEONE WHU IS WORKING WITH U,DOES THAT 2 U..QUIT??
I mean ur just boring me, i started hating u but then i told myself to deal with it..but i cant no more..I mean everything i do u have a comment about it..
Science marks..i was playing around and u took it way 2 seriously like come on..ENJOY UR LIFE..UR WAY TO MATURE..I CAN'T BELIEVE HE WUD FALL FOR U..EVEN THOUGH,IM HAPPY THAT U GUYS ARE DATING..
i seriously wud love to slap that face of urs..and trigger something in that head of urs..
it seems that im ur enemy, and ur trying to compete with me..cuz i felt that alot in science class.
u wudnt tell me ur marks..like wad is the big deal..
U JUZ becoming a Bitch and Im starting to really really hate u..Becuz, u wanna act all
smart when actually ur not..and act all innocent, I mean i hate u more than i did last year to
REBECCA.
and i dont get why u wanna be a loner..
I dont get why guys wud tell u their secret, and u knew that Alec had an email add,and u didnt tell me till a few months ago..SHIT U MAN..

Another problem is that i tried out for soccer and i noe im not going to make it becuz i wore shoes that made me slip my times..Fuck man..And even if u get chosen,ur actually still trying out..so if u get on the team paid 30 bucks..but only play 2 out of the six becuz u still suck..wtf man..so competitive..isnt it suppose 2 be FUN!!we arent not at FUCKING national..ARGH!!!

Anyway, wen i found out that NOrman was dating MOE..i found myself that a guy in my drama class likes me..though, he has blue eyes and is blonde..im going to reject him..but i dont like him..i not being mean but he is abit weird and he hasnt met my expectation of funniness..and plus, the other time i gave a chance to a guy i didnt like..i ended up hating and ignoring him..

i dont want to make any enemies..plus, i have other crushes..but they aren't that strong of likeness to them..i dont think i will find one here..

CIS people and Canada are just shit MAN!!hate Them..

2008-03-10T00:55:00.000-07:00

I don't get the world..
so many miserable people..even the people not living in poverty still have loads of cravings for useless stuff and also aren't happy with their lives..
couldn't they just appericate what they have and are given..other than blaming the world and other people for their unhappiness..
I'm not saying that I'm not one of them..I'm!!I'm craving for lot of things..a new phone, job,grades,a better house, traveling the world..

But why can't we happy, we have 3 meals a day and we get to go to school,laugh,scream, talk..For god's sake
People living in property would be very happy if they could just feed their family everyday 2 or 3 times a day..
And here we have spoil bratz, saying,i hate school, i hate the world..i blame everyone for this and that..
i have read many blogs and the people who seems to enjoy the world are the richest peopleand the people who know how to enjoy their lives..But you dont have to have money to have fun,i mean loads of people who love going to the beach, i do,going for long walks in a nice fresh weather..sports and just hanging..and guess wad!!THIS DOESN'T COST MONEY!!there are alot of things to do in life and it would cost a few dollars, we dont have to spend hundreds on something that would be kept away and never been seen again..
(i know cause im one of them..)
those who don't enjoy the world are the ones who are just not looking rite..or are out of love..but that shouldn't stop you from being happy..God, didn't put us on Earth, for people to be stinking emos..
wad so great about one..i mean, there is no emotion in an emo person..Their emotion are all coop-up inside them..then u have the hair covering their face..I can't stand to be around people who just don't enjoy what they got, and keep being miserable about what they don't have..
why dont we just switch places with the developing countries for a year..and i wonder how many spoil bratz would cry for more things..i know, i could last in a developing country for 2 months..

maybe in a few years down the road, i would understand why all this people are unhappy..but for now, i won't wanna bother but just continue with my life..or i might just be left wondering about this for a long time and never to be solve..An Unsolved Mystery!!!!

Movies i love

2008-03-06T19:59:00.000-08:00

I fell in love with this dude..tho he is not the best looking guy in the world, but i love his character in Hana Yori Dango, i must really say that i really love this version then the chinese one..It was long and it was a bit boring..While the Japanese version was straight to the point..And i really love Tukashi, she is one hell of a good actress..You people must be thinking he looks gay..But, you got to admit he looks cool..

Then there is 1 Litre of Tear another awesome show..i envy the main character Aya..She is cute, pretty and just awesome..but, sad to say that they really had a bad pick of guys to play the main Guy.

Then there is The Magician of Love and i fell in love with this another guy called Sam Wang, i was thinking how can i not seen this guy, since he is in the band 5566..and then i realise that he was the guy i thought who had the gayish hairdo..like seriously..in this show, he looks more Man..like the people in the show use to describe him..I wanna go watch Step-up2..heard it was awesome..and it looks awesome, can't blame it,it has rocking dance moves man..the first was awesome tho..

There is so many awesome shows outta there..and im telling you the best movies ever made are Bring it on and American Pie..I hope they won't stop producing their sequels.

My New skool..

2008-02-22T23:05:00.000-08:00

The new skool is totally not what i thought it wud be like..But, im still a loner and i dread going to skool everyday, i mean i have loads of fun in drama but then in math, english and geography, im like bored to death.I wanna be friends with Brooke, even though i'm, i wanna be like talking to her in english like we are good friends..But, i don't think that is going to happen..

Im totally crushing on four guys,three in my drama and another who is a coop in my geography..

The guys in my drama class that im crushing on, are Connor, Adam and Lucas..

Lucas, has the most gorgeous blue eyes i have ever seen.I notice them when he came over to my table and asked my fwen and i for an eraser, i had a short glance at his eyes..but it took my breath away.

Adam is just freaking funny, he cracks me up in drama with his corky voices and his acting..haha..and he looks cool..

Connor is also another guy that totally cracks me up..but he is just kind of a good-looking guy among the four..

The good thing about these three guys are that they play the sport that i love playing.I think Connor plays Ice-Hockey and Ice-Hockey just rocks my world.

I had to perform with the three of them and they were overweight babies, so they were lying on the ground during my performance and i cudn't stop laughing at them becuz they were so funny.At one point, Connor almost grab my leg, so i put them on the chair.But, they were really nice to me, becuz i was really crept out about performing with only
30minutes of practices..At, one point,my partner told me to hug Adam, becuz we were doing this Maury thingy.and Adam was the baby and i didnt want him..I hesitated becuz i didn't think the guy wud wanna hug me and he was like"come here, give me a hug."and people were watching me.

The fourth guy is named Justin, i dont noe what i like abt him, maybe cuz he is nice, and he sits like right across the room from me and every time i look up he is like just there.

I'm not crazy over boys. I just having a small tiny crush on them.If some hottie were to pass by i wud forget abt the 4 of them for that moment. My heart is still searching for the right guy out there..

Anyway, i haven't been able to be me..To people, i'm just this quiet and shy new girl from Singapore..I just wanna be around people that i can really be me, i wanna talk, laugh and scream out loud at sports games..I WANNA BE HYPER..haha..even eating chocolate didn't make me loud.Anyway, Soccer season is coming up..and i hope that i wud be cut out for the team, if not then track and field,hoping im fit enough to join.

A new country, A new skool but still me

2008-02-02T12:26:00.000-08:00

THIS IS ISSAC/ICY AKA MR HOT SHOT

THIS IS SAMMY AKA CRY BABY

THIS IS BEN AKA THE KISS UP
He grew so much since i last saw him

ON The way to Mac's...(this wasnt edited at all)

CANADA is just Awesome,Apart from it being really cold and making u feel like u cud freeze to death..THe Clothes are just awesome here, got two new shirt and jeans..THis shirt is an XS and it just fits me..cannot imagine if it was a size in Singapore.

This is a small and it has a hoodie..coolness rite..

Anyway, i signed up for school and it is just a 5mintues walk away..The skool is awesome but i dont know if the people studying there wud be nice or friendly and so im having the creeps..I have 2 more days and im freaking out like crazy..Anyway, i got to choose my courses..But they were the ones that i was going to take in CIS..So no Difference..Just that i get to choose another arts course because they dont have mandarin and i don't even noe anything about French.SO, Drama it is..

Having alot of doubt on it because, the first time i took it, god the pain!!!, the Nightmare that i had to go through and forever thanking god that i dont have to take it ever again..well, here i'm choosing it because i heard it has less hmwk..Awesome and i can meet people there.while in art i suck big time at it..so i decided no to choose it..but, i just realise that i wud have to take an exam for drama both written and acting..and darn it..i wud have Ace that mandarin exam in CIS.

The teacher guidance was nice, she picked the teachers she thought was nice..and im hoping she is rite..anyway, i get to change my course to an easier one if im struggling at my math or geography.But, im going to try hard and hopefully i wud find a friend that is willing to help me in my work.

2008-01-18T06:43:00.001-08:00

(Some Random pictures..muahha..)

Last Day at CIS

2008-01-15T23:20:00.000-08:00

Not a very great last day, cuz i had to take a freaking science exam. But, after that i was fine, knowing that i freaking screwed the whole paper.Anyway, proceed to running around trying to get my school leaving paper to teachers.

Then, i went on to clearing out my locker very mess yet i never used it.I have to head back to School on Tuesday to collect the refund payment. Thought of maybe sitting in class with MOMO..but i don't want to spolit my sleeping time.Muhahha..God!! I'm leaving in 12 days..wow, so far yet so near.Gonna miss Becca, i hope her encouragement of studying hard will be with me.AND NEVER TO BE PUT UNDER PEER PRESSURE OF USELESS BUMS WHO COULDN'T CARE LESS ABOUT THEIR FUTURE.

Anyway, school ended in a really surprising way.As a tradition in our school, we would sign shirts of people leaving and i was the only person asking people to sign my shirt.And just as everyone was done, ALEC said to me from like 1m away "your Leaving??"And i said ya..and he ask me to come (cuz somehw he sprained his ankle don't know how, even though my friend asked him.) So i looked at him and he said he wanted to sign my shirt.Feeling all happy in the inside, trying to see what he wrote , he told me to look away so being me i did.

Anyway, Becca and Moe were like "Heidi here your chance, tell him or we will."I said "no!!!!" so ya till now he doesnt know, but i think it is quite obverse that i like him.

My shirt ending up looking weird, cuz Caro drew something inappropriate at the front so ya got alot of stares from that. Thanks CARO!!!

Anyway, still totally can't wait to leave, be BACK ON JULY 22 so NO WORRIES PEOPLE!!! But, everyone would be studying hard for N Levels and i be stuck to be my loner self.Until August when people return from their hoilday, WooHOO!!!..Coolness..

Last Day of 2007

2007-12-31T14:35:00.000-08:00

Last day of 2007,there is like 10 hours left till 2008..

Trying to recall all the things that has happen this year.
All lot of good and bad, trying to 4get the bad and thinking very hard about all the good that has happen.

I pray hard that next year would be a better year, which i do every year and somehow it doesn't really happen.Darn it!! "Maybe people don't wish for a better year", but i wish for one.

This Christmas wasn't that great, i spend it with my bro and mum at KL on Christmas we ate dinner at Chalet and then watch tv..How fun right??I bet Nessa had a better Christmas..I wished that i could have spend Christmas with the Boys..I guess there is always next year.

But the worst thing about starting a new year, is that at the second week, i have to sit for an exam..Great right!!

so after blogging, i would just go and studied for science which i haven't started but the good thing is that i haven't forgotten much.Still have to study for Biology(which i thought was my favorite subject) and Physic and today my favorite "chemistry".

I can't wait for the exams to be over,so that i can go back to work, I'm freaking missing out on all the fun.Plus, if im staying, i could catch the boys bb game..

I can't wait for 2008 to start,cause i could go back to school and see all my friends..i praying hard that on the 18th i get to go back to Canada.Which is only three weeks away.I have to go visit all my friends,not cause im leaving but cause i miss all of them so very much.

I was telling Dad to book the ticket for the night time, so i could spend the whole day chilling with friends.Then, some of them could see me off at the airport if they wanna, so ya..But, this might only be a dream, i guess we have to see if this dream is real in three weeks.

Well, i will be back to write...soon...

Do you called them Friends?

2007-12-06T10:20:00.000-08:00

It seems there is no point having friends because they keep secrets from you. Somehow, I still called them my “friends”.

Friends tend to share their secrets with you and share things with you. But the friends I have are really mean, they want you to tell them your secret and then when you don’t tell them they use it against you or they get mad to try and get you into telling them. The worst part is that they speak in another language and you ask them what they are talking the go or nothing.

That is seriously annoying; it is like I’m their enemy of some sort. They also pass notes to each other and like hiding it between themselves. I ask or I look and then they go or you can’t know. That freaking annoys the hell out of me. Some how these two girls Moe and Rebecca have become so close and like leaves me out of the secret world. They want me to tell them my secret.

So I learnt my lesson, I got one secret that both of them want to know but somehow people won’t tell them. I got my information from sister’s friends. This year, they all change, you have your secret and I have my secret and we don’t share it. I guess it is all because of Moe the new girl. Somehow, she is starting to annoy me with her innocent behavior. She won’t let me copy her homework but tends to want people to give her answer when she does it. She won’t cut the line because I don’t know why.

She use to tell what she shares with Rebecca but that changed. I guess cause people likes telling her secrets and she became proud.

I don’t know what to think now, so now, I just keep quiet and don’t ask any question when they are talking about it, and I try to ignore it, so that they get annoyed when I don’t ask and just keep quiet when they tell me.

I thank the lord for letting me leave them and I so regretted leaving Caroline’s group I should have stick with them and not care about Rebecca needs cause now she got a new friend and she leaves at the corner. Nice friend right. Hopefully, in my new school I would find better friends.

The other thing, which is really annoying, is that when I told them about what happened during work, like a customer scolded me because I forgot to give back her change. Moe told me the nasty thing. She said you work for them so you serve people well. Well, excuse me! It told them, you guys don’t understand how difficult is it to serve people who are so choosy, you can’t possibly expect me to smile the whole time I’m working FYI, I serve customer well. ok. Then, they go but your working for them or they ask me why don’t I quit. Fuckers. So, the next time, they find a part time job I’m going to do the same thing too.

You will never understand the person till you yourself try it. Both of them try to be big shots and want to always be right. So, I can’t wait to leave this freaking country like so badly, so I can be far far away from them. Somehow, I would tell them about this. But, for now, I guess I just have to deal with their shit.

2007-11-18T01:06:00.000-08:00

The gods must really be mad today..IT was bang,roar,boom...haha..but no rain..Finally, i guess someone and so they started crying and then it rain...but the war isn't over until the last man has fallen..oh wadever...

Nessa and Daddy has left for Canada..I'm stuck with Darcy and the woman..I miss them so much even though they only left for like five days..I have 10 weeks of hell be4 i can leave this devilish world..But, guess wad she does want us to leave..she was like if i earn enough money, u guys can stay, if your dad hasn't found a job and a house in Canada..Well, i don't want to stay here, though i dont want to leave all my darlings behind...:(

Anyway, updates is that we lose to the GESS aka the German skool..All three teams lose to them..expect for our team, the sucky one..but the thing that u wont believe is that we were kinda leading and then we lose to them by 1 basket.Like wad the fucking hell men..The u16 whu were suppose to be undefeated was defeated.

I was like a freaking mad score keeper screaming my head of the last quarter. PLus, My slight crush Norman, was i think looking at me when i was being a retard..abt him, i turn my feelings to like him, as we got his email and then, i chatted with him and i found him interesting jsut like my friends had said.But, one thing is that he ignores me most of the time when we have a three way convo..I dont know wad he has against me..but one more thing is that he told becca whu he likes..like after 2 days of knowing each other..like wth..all the clue i got was that he likes a decent girl..but i need another clue, WHAT GRADE IS SHE??

I'm dying here..i guess i will have to find out one day when i'm in Canada..I have to find out two things when i get back to canada and they are what did Kaori said abt me and whu is Norman's crush..

2007-11-11T20:17:00.000-08:00

Well, i think, it was wrong to ask for a happy family because it not going to happen..
There is alot of things we ask and it never get answered or later in life it does get answered.I had a question that i asked myself a few months ago..the question was "what would i do or will happen to me if my mum is no longer in this world.The question was answer in this few months..i just realized it one day when i was sitting down day-dreaming when that pop into my head..This question wud be answer when i move to canada..

Abt that, i moving ack to canada..whoop teedo!!!I can't wait to see how life in canda wud be like..even though i heard abt drugs i even watch a video on it..but i promise not to take it, looking at the people is freaking scary..anyway, from wad i can dream and think of now..is that life wud be perfect, i mean a room of my own,phone and my cat..haha..haiz..awesome..but, the thing i can't bear to live behind here in singapore, are my percious dogs and my friends...i have been to seven different schools since the day i started to go to school..that alot..and now i be moving to another one..

I mean i wud get to make new ones but i would miss the old ones..wait..lemme think, i actually i wont really miss them, maybe Moe and Caro..i dont noe..but im sure that i would miss Norman and Alec..haha..Cute guys..i guess i will find new ones in the new skool in Canada..But, they would be different,there won't be much aisan..

But moving back canada seems fun, but each time, i think about moving back there, alec and Norman flash back to me,that i have to leave them behind..then i get all upset..but, i have two months with them..before bye bye..but i guess, i will find new guys to replace them, just like i did for haikal and Kelvin..haha

I almost forgot..Yesterday, we went to danna's party and norme..haha..ok..norme showed up with his sister..whu looked abit freaky..well, i thought i looked freaky myself..but we went to play basketball and he didnt join us..(i noe why, whu wudnt seeing how weird we are)instead he sat with his sister..and guess wad he and his sister well, they looked like couples..but they won't the lovey dovey ones..haha..but he is cute and we were telling danna what we thought..and blah blah blah....

The PIcs

2007-11-06T14:35:00.000-08:00

(Norman)
(the pic is better because he doesnt move around much)

(Alec)
(NOt a very good one,took while he was playing basketball,not a very good idea)

ROUND 1 !!!DING DING!!

2007-11-03T15:00:00.000-07:00

(the guy was nice enough to let me take his pic)
(there is also another one coming)

ROUND 1...DING DING...MUMMY VS VANESSA.. Mummy gains a point for smacking vanessa across the head..Vanessa hits her back across the head..DIng Ding..another point..they are tied..Mummy get pissed and she fires another hit but misses because vanessa quick reaction block it.Vanessa gains a point.I run of the mat..scared like hell.so the war ended ..MUmmy one and vanessa two..VANESSA Wins..

HAve u been force to not break-up with a guy just so u can go out with everyone and watch a movie.well, i have..she wanted to go watch a movie because it is her 2months together with her bf..and i didnt like the guy im dating now..cause i like someone else..there are actually a few reason why i dont like him.
1.he walks really weirdly..can't really blame him..
2.His smiles crepts me out in a way
3.he wouldnt tell why he gets jealous and he start gossiping behind me to my friend..LIKE A GAL..
4.He was desperate (when a person rejects u once u dont ask the person again nine days later.. and u dont cut urself and skip class because of that person.)
5.he tries to be someone else then himself..and tries to be as funny as that guy but he turns to be lame.
6.His thinking is also inmatured.
7.Lastly, a boring person who doesnt try to join in.

I'm called mean because he loves me so much and blah blah..and that it is wrong of me to break his heart..This wad i wanna say..shut the fuck up...when u dont like a person no more, u dont pretend to like him..it is weird..plus, i dont want to marry him..so i see no point in contiuning plus, the rest i went into the relationship was being i pity him..whu noes hw many time he may ask me to go into a relationship with him..

Here my advice for u..
1.dont sound desperate for a girl in ur next relationship beccause nobody likes that..
2.be urself..and try to act like a boy more than a girl
3.stop complaining abt her to another people..just tell her urself...

so, i was going to break-up with him today..but i have to wait because somehw he needs his mummy to talk to when i break-up with him..im just jking..but he needs a guy friend to talk too..have u ever heard of that..like seriously..i dont noe if he is really a guy..and once i break-up with him, im free!!!and i can make him freaking jealous..im mean..but wadever..i dont care abt him..because i have better things to worry abt than a relationship at this moment...

Crazy me!

2007-10-25T22:51:00.002-07:00

We had our final game of the semester and we lost to the Oversea family school.Sucks man..we were leading 6 to nothing in the first half and then I think they caught up in the second half and then they were leading at the end of the four quarter and they won 17-24..Plus, I was freaking mad at JADE G. Such a bitch..she shouted at me for guarding her player.HELOO!! I should have shouted at her and say “have you heard the word called DOUBLE TEAM!!” and if u haven’t, go look it up and learn it. And don’t tell me what to do or not what to do because you don’t know the first thing about basketball and there is no I in team.” I So regretted it big time. I wished I had shouted at her. Because, after that I got pissed and then I couldn’t concentrate and then I shouted at Joanna.. Big mistake. Because she is my friend. I ended up apologizing to her after that. But, jade didn’t. such a fucker.

After the game, My friends and i, we went home with this really cute guy names alec..Omg, he was FREAKING CUTE! Like his facial expression and that is the day I actually talked to him as a friend more than a stranger. it was AWESOME. but he may know that I liked him and I have like an slight crush on him. Plus, I was looking at him most of the time. I can’t help myself. What can I say he is such a nice, cute guy! He has the nicest, sweetest smile ever. And when he smiles he looks like a small kid..haha..

Now,whenever, I see him, I get to see his cute smile. Guess what!!i’m crazy over him, I’m obsessed over him.Moe think that he is weird.becca think he’s cute and im inlove with hi.I can’t stop thinking about him since yesterday. Vanessa wanted to tell him that I like him..AHHHH!!!..Vanessa is good friends with him, even though that would be a good idea,but I moving back and I don’t think he would like me back in that where.

Plus, later time, I got rejected by a guy, even though I didn’t say a word to him, but my big mouth friend did..sobbing sobbing..haha

Pissed off

2007-10-17T23:58:00.000-07:00

Have you ever had friends who were seriously mean and heartless, well I have friends like that in a way.I guess it kinda of Karma cause I did it to my friends in Grade 5,well, cause I acted like a smartass, that what you get in return for acting like a smartass, Heidi. We had this science lab to do and it was three people in a group and so there were four of us and the two ELS girls. I thought ok, two of us would be together and then two with each other and we would pick one ELS girl to work with us. But, guess what I was so wrong, the three of them picked each other and I was stuck with the two girls. They didn’t really help me at all and I was the only doing everything. I told them, what I thought before and they were like I help you tomorrow ok. I was happy because now at least I have help, how wrong again I was. They totally annoyed me, and when I ask Danna if I could look at her diagrams she was like no.

WHAT THE HELL MAN.. Erm. have you forgotten that I’m your friend here? And I don’t think I ever did that to you. When I told them that it hard working with them, they were like we had to work with them the other time. But they had only one, and wasn’t the only freaking person working with both of them. So I got pissed off. I decide to ask Tung yi and she help me and guess what I ain’t good friends with her and she was nice enough to help me. I like so regretted leaving their group. So during P.E I starting smashing the birdie and they were like why are you so piss, like how dumb can they be. You left me with two people who weren’t helpful at all.

My mum is seriously getting on my nerve, like I can’t stay back at her and come back in peace. She starts nagging at me, hello, I was at school watching a Basketball games and I always do. Guess what, she doesn’t believe me, very dumb. She goes, “I will call the school and ask them”. Well, guess what go ahead I don’t give. I love watching Basketball games, she doesn’t know me, and so she starts saying nonsense, if she knew me better, she would let me watch them. She never use to be like that when I was in the local school, isn’t she suppose to be acting like this when I’m in the local not in a freaking private school!!! Just because, I like being at school and always the last one home doesn’t mean I’m doing stupid things outside. Darcy and Vanessa are boring people who comeback early and I’m not like them. We each are interested in different thing, if she notice, but I guess she” too Busy”. I love sports can’t she see that and I don’t know about Darcy and Vanessa. She never asks me, so how was your game, or bother to come a watch my games. I will make sure that if I go back to Canada and if Isaac, Sam and Ben have any games, I would be there to support them, like a true sister would do or a family member would do.

My Mum is seriously killing me inside; I still love her deeply inside my heart, even though I don’t show it on the outside. She doesn’t even realize it, and she can’t see that our family is falling apart and she still want us to go back to Canada. What Kind of person is she?? Is She going to miss me?, Would She forget me?, I may never know or I would.

Im stressed Out!!

2007-09-30T14:30:00.000-07:00

I'm like so stress out..like seriously..My family is in a crisis..my mum and dad still freaking cant get along ..I'm in the middle of the whole situation..being a very emtionalperson..i cant stand the pain anymore and i think in an depression stage..i dont noe exactly if im in it..but it is just that i get all upset and i cant seem to have fun..though i was kinda laughing alot yesterday..when im in a quiet place,i think about and when I'm in a noisy place, i cant think straight and i get all stressed out.. i dont noe what to do..and hearing that my sista hates my mum i get all hurt inside..though my sista words were right..that my mum had alot of time to spend for this man and she was always to busy to spend time with us..how is that possible..it made me think she right..and i hated her for that..but then i realise deep down inside she is still my mum and i still love her.even though i don't feel the love from her..

though my dad has become a really cool guy because he lets me hang with my friends,HE LETS ME HAVE A PHONE,which i never expect in a million years wud happen to me,lastly,i feel the love from him..But, all of this doesn't make the pain in my heart fade away..i cant stand anymore..i almost broken down in class just now,after spending so much time on a my isometric drawing and it turns out i did it all wrong..

I don't noe how long i can go on with this,i guess i need someone to talk too really badly and can give me some advice to handle this situation..i have Fiona, but i don't wanna talk to her,cause i dont noe,she doesn't really pay attention to wad I'm saying..

I'm trying my best to not think about it to much,but if i sit and day-dream that is the thing which enters my head..now,it seems that i cant love anyone..i don't even noe if i still love my bf..and all my crushes..the love inside me,has just left me..just like that..it seems like i don't noe
the word love anymore...i was crazy over this guy but now as i write i don't think I'm crazy abt him anymore..and i think becoz of this problem..it destroy the love i had in everyone...

My mum did the mst meanest thing by taking away my bank book,and i can't redraw money to spend on myself..but,im going to get it back..no matter what..and then she cut my money to half of what i was getting..i imagine if my dad wasnt on my side..i can believe i wud be living in hell right now..

A heart attack

2007-09-22T22:34:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I got like a heart attack..This dude was like staring at me which I thought was kinda normal becoz I thought he was waiting to get something..after he bought his food he ask wad race am i.. I told him as again it was normal cause he is not the first person to ask me that.Then, khamis came and he said “u noe ur very famous, this guy ask me to sit down with him and he ask everything about u” i laughed,,then, I saw the same guy whom I serve and I knew it was him but just ot confirm, I ask khamis if that is the guy and he was like ya.i started laughing..and I didn’t think much..then came closing time..i was counting my money..then khamis told me he was waiting for me outside..i seriously got scared and I was like omg.i don’t wanna go hom.. then another guy came and told that this guy was looking for me. I almost cried I was seriously scared. Then, I went to floor to meet my friend.the dude was there,he wanted to talk..i was still scared..

He wanted to be my friend..but lucky me I already got a guy..and I told him that I was attached..haha..and lucky my guy wasn’t there cause I don’t know what wud have happened.but I noe something not good.he was like so how many days have u guys been together..erm TWO..haha..and he was like “shit,im two days late and I was like erm ya...” “he is a guy from ns who is 20” please, I will never ever again go for a guy who is like so much older than me.maybe when im abit older than ya.haha.. i gave my number, because he wanted to be friends. I have no problem with that.. The guy went heading towards the mrt.

We left for the bus-stop and like a few minutes later, he appeared. I was like is this guy stalking me or something..if he is then, I made a big mistake by giving him my number. he was like I didn’t get ur msg.. he wanted to go for coffee at 11 at night?? Then he left, and the guys were urur guy isn’t here and I was like im not lucky that he was not here.. I made khamis follow me and wait with me till my dad came..cause I was freaking scared..even now, as I write I’m afraid that wen I leave my house I may meet this guy and I will have to think of an excuse to tell him. lucky that

Argh!!life is really scary. especially if like perverted old man comes up to u and ask you if u have a bf..ewwww!!!!

Gossip..

2007-09-13T11:11:00.000-07:00

My dear friend,kaori-chan...has gotten her heartbroken,i feel her pain,deep down inside..maybe because i like him too...by i dont think,im crazy over him..but,wadever...MOE told me not to tell her..but,it hurts really hurts me and i wanna share her pain..but i cant..argh!!!all i can do is smile and said can i hug u..that the only way i can confront her.. That guy is like super super hot..he plays basketball and has a tattoo..i not a big fan of his tattoo..but he is hot..and he liked this gal named hyun-ah..and that freaking gal knew that the guy liked her and kaori liked him..so she started flirting with him.NICE RIGHT!!and guess wad she has a freaking bf...wad a flirt,player and a bitch..

Kaori is like freaking brave..she liked asked him out but she got rejected...sad..but she is strong and i will always be there to support even though she doesnt noe..I wanna go up to him and scream at the dude and ask him why why???but i guess it wud make matters worst and also you cant force a person to like you...
But,i think that guy is the perfect match for her..nessa said that he is such a gentleman..omg...if only evry guy was like that..Then, i started liking this guy named erfan..omg,his eyes are like freaking gorgeous..haha..it doesnt suit his face..cause first his an asian i think..so ya..and his body is like WOW!!!haha..

but,life goes on..and on and on...and i dont think he will accept me..but i get to see him everyday from 1010 to 1115 because he has lunch while i have pe..wow..but, i dont think he notices me..haha..anyway, i rejected this guy and he likes cut himself..i felt bad..but,we are still friends..and i tried y freaking best to make him happy and i guess he is..i still have towait till

the last one..

2007-09-05T12:11:00.000-07:00

well, the truth is finally out..and his answer to me was "he doesnt like me,he treats me as he good friend."and guess wad he likes liyana my good friend..i couldnt believe my ears.but,i knew it..everytime,she plays with him i tell her that he likes her..and i guess i cursed myself..and i was the last one to know AGAIN!!!

i told her,that he is a nice guy and that she should go out with him because another guys have broken her heart and i noe he would treat her good..i made her promise me that she wont be lovey dovey with him in front of me and think about going out with him.Since,many girls had busted him,she could his first who didnt.but,she was afriad he wud to her.So,i made him promise me he would stay true to her.

i just have to get on with life..hopefully, i can forget about this.When,i got home,i couldnt sleep..the scene kept on playing in my head over and over again.Things are going to change after this and i think it has started..she didnt come today for the meeting and she promise me she would..i do everything to made her happy..i didnt even force her to come home with me because i didnt wanna spoil her fun..but,she couldnt keep her promise as to come to the meeting..which upset me alot..i feel betrayed..but whatever..i guess friends come go.

I needed her the most yesterday on the way home..and she like totally ignore my msg..i dont noe what to think now..my heart is bleeding in pain..i wanna scream,cry and stab my heart..so i cant feel this hurt anymore.

ANGRY PARENTS

2007-09-04T15:00:00.000-07:00

I guess the day I'm leaving this country has come true..no more lies,no more maybes or no..Now,it is a conform that im leaving..and when is that in a couple of weeks..now it is for a different story..i thought my family would be different from all my friends but it mine turned out the same..Like every other western married a singaporean end up having a divorce..i thought my mom and dad love each other so much and that could never happen to me..

WELL,guess wad heidi u were freaking wrong..ur parents hate each other since saturday the 1sept..i didnt noe that it wud become worst after saturday and dad found out..wow such a suprise...i told liyana that if my dad and mum leaves i may stay in singapore or canada..but i cant choose between both my parents becuase i love them both..

The worst part was seeingmy dad break down in front of me..like omg..that the freaking first time im seen him so freaking upset..i think my mum like stab him right in the heart..Like freaking seriously.when i saw him so upset,i coldnt stop crying..

so far i told was liyana,zak and rebecca and fiona..zak and fiona are like me.they have like singaporean mum and a western dad..and their parents marriage didnt last long..

Starting in a new skool all over again plus in a country where people are totally oppsite of me..i dont think i will get along with them..epspecially the western or popular people..argh!! i going to have a hard time living through high skool..PLus,i will be far away from nessa poo..i don noe if can live without her not being around with me..boohoo!!! why??

A message to my BEST FRIEND!!

2007-08-31T12:14:00.000-07:00

dear bestie,

You were there for me no matter wad..ur there when im in danger or u know that something bad is going to happen to me..you guard me and protect from evil villians.You walk with me to the bus-stop to make sure im alright.you sleep below me to protect me from evil villians.You give everything,your love and life.When,i should up at home,your there to welcome me home,but i ignore you.You walk off thinking what did u do that im treating in this manner.

But in return,i won't even touch because of the smell you carry.because ur not perfect.i don't think i give you all the love that you have gave me.I hate myself seeing you sad,pain and not being you.I not fit to be your best friend,i noe u can just leave me anytime..I know i shud treasure u now,cause when ur gone, i will regret it..and when that time comes,it wud be too late.

You sit in front of me,smiling at me and i smile back and then i walk away for a few hours before u see me again.U feel bored,u want to run,be entertain but im not doing a very good job.I wish u could forgive me,but even if u do,i won't noe..I LOVE YOU with all my heart and losing you will be the saddiest thing that ever happen.

2007-08-25T14:30:00.000-07:00

HE officially hates me..We didnt talk at all during work..I wont even touch any part of him.and he wont to me either..but,when i came to work,i saw him staring at me..well, i dont noe if he was but he was looking at my direction..and i dont think he was staring at the manager..haha

He told liyana that he was going to confront me yesterday and he wanted to do it at the counter.Then,liyana said arent you afriad she wold cry at the counter..he was like no..liyana your heartless and he said yap..omg..his heart is seriously cold-black..argh!!but the funny thing is that i couldnt stop laughing..i dont noe wad the hell i was laughing atbut i noe i was just laughing at nothing.

Later,i did the topping up and there was like a lady asking if the counters were open.i was freaking lazy to take an order.so i decide to do the toaster master cleaning.he came out of his hiding and he looked at me and i looked at him.but the sight of him looking at me made me feeling heartbroken inside..because i noe the truth,while i think he think that i dont noe..

i kinda blow everything..i had a feeling he used to like me cause if he didnt he would have totally ignored me like yesterday and i irrated him by asking him question when he asked me one..while,wadever..i think he would have chose the other girl,i wish him all the best..

i was having a heart-attack when it came to closing.i wanted to leave so badly but liyana told if i leave he is going to think im a coward, so i didnt..then,at the bus-stop i just like sit there till he wented home..and i realised that he was the coward..not me..i was waiting for him to confront and he stood me up..but i guess he is going to tell me today..cause im freaking lonely today..i dont have any friends to go home with.argh!!i'm seriously going to die..

i hate you

2007-08-23T20:50:00.000-07:00

i freaking hate my mum..sorry..but im like seriously mad at her now..just because i come home late..(6pm)she gets angry at me and freaking thinks im up to something..and she decides to take my phone back..fine!!when, she can't communicate with me.then to bad for her..i don't give,i make sure,i come home freaking late,so she gets mad and then i tell her i have no phone to call her and no tens cent..haha,then i hope she will give me the phone back..

then,she use her freaking annoying tactics to try and threatened me to faster give her the phone..but i couldnt cause i needed to delete my msg cause there were freaking msg which i dont want her to read..she got mad and starting saying..fooling around again.i was like wadever..

so later,i try to explain,that i needed the phone because my boss needs to call me..and she was like she can call me..like hello..u flying to brunei,how is she going to call u..i make sure that i call her when she teaching and make sure the volume of the ring tone is freaking loud..then it wud interupt her class..haha.i just so mad at her rite now..but i hope i will get the phone back soon..if not nvm..i just get a new one..haha..i have the money...i hate you until u give me my phone or i will never talk or listen to you..ass

PS..i noe i sound really mean..but she just gets on my nerve..